Catching people out, whats the worst you have seen. Adult humour( you have been told)
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Thread: Catching people out, whats the worst you have seen. Adult humour( you have been told)

  1. #1

    Default Catching people out, whats the worst you have seen. Adult humour( you have been told)

    TBS reminded me of something that happened when i was younger. It involved myself and 2 friends (who were brothers).

    We went to Brother A's room to find Brother B chucking his chicken at the computer desk. Honestly iv never seen anything move so quick in my life.

    Brother A proceeds to throw a duvet over Brother B and kicks the complete crap out of this poor lad. The inhuman whimper that came from the human duvet was horrid.

    Now thats a danger wank!

    I needed to share this as it haunts me still

  2. #2

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    my parents.....
    Quote Originally Posted by uberdark View Post
    i prefer to get two miniatures and rub them around on my gaming bobos.
    Totally going for #1 -->

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    I did see a homeless couple go at it from my South Dakota Hotel window once.

    Not quite the same, but this winter, when it was bitterly cold (-50 wind chill) I watched another weird looking dude walk around in what looked like pajamas. Then he ducked behind a few cars, pulled off his pants and underwear...threw his underwear away, and pulled his pants back up. I believe the fellow had shit himself. The car he was leaning against got a frozen chocolate pudding stain across the door. LOL.

  4. #4
    Brushlicker noneedforaname's Avatar
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    When I worked at chicagos in Bolton had to ask a couple who were both well into their sixties to cease fornicating in full public view and to kindly vacate said premises. I have many horror stories involving that place.

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    Official Freak Bar Witch wiccanpony's Avatar
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    sorry ..taking it to the grave with me ;D
    " So remember that, when they're beating your ass with a metal shovel while you're dressed as Little Bo Peep - it's not deviant...it's art.

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    Superfreak!!! Torn blue sky's Avatar
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    The most outstanding achievment must have been when I was 5 or 6, waking up and walking into the parents room while they were going at it. I didn't realise it then, but the more i'd thought about it later the more I couldn't stop laughing about the fact I totally c*ck blocked my dad.
    Of course, when you've witnessed your parents fornicating, everything else seems trivial. So yeah.

    Knew a bloke that'd just come off patrol rotation, sitting in the mess tent he has a massive smile on his face all of a sudden. "What the f**k are you smiling about?!" He's asked "Just shit meself!" He replies with a huge grin.
    (For those not in the know, after eating field rations for a week or more, your first few "proper" meals go right through you) Now, it'd never occurred to me before, but when you find yourself laughing your ass off at someone that's crapped themselves at the dinner table, there has to be a mental deficiency somewhere lol. The fact He stuck his hands down his keks and slung some at the boy opposite before waddling away at high speed damn near finished me off...
    I have a cunning plan...So cunning you could pin a tail on it and call it a Weasel...

  7. #7

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    Hmm... does catching my grandparents nekkid in the hot tub count?

    Grandma ran for it. Grandpa just stayed in the water grinnin'.
    "Reality, she's a mathematical bitch from hell.", MaxedOutMama
    Wanna be bored? Watch me twitter. --<>-- Still have neurons? Watch my YouTube channel on painting!
    Want to know when to fry your neurons? My painting twitter will announce the videos.
    To judge how far to follow my advice, consider this: ---<>--- Slappin' paint on minis since 2006

  8. #8

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    Well, I've cockblocked my dad and his wife a few times, accidentally headbutted him in his naked groin as he came out from the bathroom once as well, that was hilarious(during the olden days when I wasn't my mighty 5.5 feet). Haven't caught mom and her boyfriend in the act that I remember but there have been quite a few moments where I've sighed and gotten back to sleep after having been woken up by "strange" noises from their room below mine. Oh, and I have walked in on my younger sis and her boyfriend voluntarily once just to tell her to keep the effing noise down as I was trying to sleep in the room next to hers...
    Quote Originally Posted by TrystanGST View Post
    The secret? Practice, and a desire to get better. A little talent goes a long way, but as long as you're open to advice, you can do amazing things.

  9. #9

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    TBS id have passed out,TOILET HUMOUR ohhh i give up!

  10. #10
    Superfreak!!! Torn blue sky's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Chrome View Post
    . Oh, and I have walked in on my younger sis and her boyfriend voluntarily once just to tell her to keep the effing noise down as I was trying to sleep in the room next to hers...
    Reminds me of the time a bunch of us did that to someone at a party, door open and a barrage of about 7 party poppers and the shrill of an equal amount of those party whistle things. I can tell you, it didn't elicit the desired response. Not a shit was given that day.

    MoF, I really REALLY want to meet someone that's passed out from extensive effort on the toilet one day! It's probably wrong I class that as a life achievement.
    I have a cunning plan...So cunning you could pin a tail on it and call it a Weasel...

  11. #11

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    High school.

    Trip to see the Pope on his visit to New Orleans.

    Shared a hotel room with 3 other boys from my church group - 2 to a bed.

    Woke up one night to the guy next to me and the girl he'd snuck in having sex.

  12. #12

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    Quote Originally Posted by vincegamer View Post
    High school.

    Trip to see the Pope on his visit to New Orleans.

    Shared a hotel room with 3 other boys from my church group - 2 to a bed.

    Woke up one night to the guy next to me and the girl he'd snuck in having sex.

    I thought this was heading towards a Priestly accusation....lol

  13. #13

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    I thought it was leading to man love!

  14. #14

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    Bah, I bet it was just dark, boys and girls that age look and sound all the same anyway, I bet it was boy love ;D
    Quote Originally Posted by TrystanGST View Post
    The secret? Practice, and a desire to get better. A little talent goes a long way, but as long as you're open to advice, you can do amazing things.

  15. #15

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    I've been really fortunate in that I've not seen too much. Never walked in on my parents, never saw old or homeless folks. I think the worst was some drunk dude at a baseball game strip down to his drawers and flash a bunch of girls (who luckily were in the section behind me) until he got his arse arrested. Had some rather noisy neighbors once or twice- well, the girl anyway, and she was pretty comical to listen to.

  16. #16

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    In the Intrepid Fox (rock pub) back before it moved, I spied through a window a commotion. Some old tubby bloke was strutting about in wet, white boxers. I mentioned it to those I was with but instead of "really?!" and rushing to the windows one merely looked at his watch to confirm "yeah, he's normally out this time of night".

    Another time, at a gencon in Manchester, a bunch of us geeky gamers headed out for the night for beers and kebabs. We saw, in a carpark, a lady in a white dress shift herself around a bit and squat for a pee. At least, that's what one of us thought, the rest of us were aware we were wandering in Canal Street and that lady was no lady. We moved on leaving him to act the voyeur, and when he caught up didn't even mention it, much.

    Been the victim of that walking in lark. A friend so used to just breezing into my room walked in one day to see my little bum rising and falling. My girlfriend and I never moved faster, so much so we weren't even sure if he'd seen anything because he just sat down and started chatting. It must have been about Star Wars, else I'm sure I'd have told him to bugger off.

  17. #17
    Superfreak!!! Torn blue sky's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Wyrmypops View Post
    In the Intrepid Fox (rock pub) back before it moved, I spied through a window a commotion. Some old tubby bloke was strutting about in wet, white boxers. I mentioned it to those I was with but instead of "really?!" and rushing to the windows one merely looked at his watch to confirm "yeah, he's normally out this time of night".
    That'll be our Reverend!
    I have a cunning plan...So cunning you could pin a tail on it and call it a Weasel...

  18. #18

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    Quote Originally Posted by Wyrmypops View Post
    It must have been about Star Wars, else I'm sure I'd have told him to bugger off.
    And that, ladies and not-so-gentle-men, is how you spot a dyed-in-the-wool fan(atic).
    Proud owner of a Cassar!

    #1378/9460
    You are ranked 1351 out of 9441 artists.



  19. #19

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    attended a RODEO that never was once, allow me to explain, one of the lads copped off with this ginger haired girl nicknamed "the red setter" absolutely gorgeous from the neck down, oh and ginger did i mention that it is important as anyone who's ever been with a ginger will know they aint rusty down there for no reason anyway several of us went to his room and proceeded to hide in various places, wardrobes lockers behind the sofa armchairs etc. next thing, enter the randy couple who then proceed to get down and jiggy wid it. However imagine our surprise when the red setter requests that "M" (identity concealed to protect the innocent) go down and inspect her rusty firebox, sort of face to face "M" once in position to accomplish requested task recieves on of the loudest fanny farts to the face i have ever heard in my life. picture the scene, the settter frantically trying to hold him under the covers while laughin uncontrollably, then having the smile wiped off her face though when several seconds later she's joined in her merth and merryment by several drunk soldiers who proceeded to fall about the place in hysterics.
    LAAARRFF, I SPLIT MY SIDES!!

    cassar [demigod] |ˈdemēˌgäd|
    noun ( fem. demigoddess |ˈdemēˌgädis| )
    a being with partial or lesser divine status, such as a minor deity, the offspring of a god and a mortal, or a mortal raised to divine rank.
    • a person who is greatly admired or feared.
    ORIGIN mid 16th cent.: translating Latin semideus .

    on a serious note, i do commissions, no really i do, ask and ye shall receive


  20. #20

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    Best. Story. Ever.
    Proud owner of a Cassar!

    #1378/9460
    You are ranked 1351 out of 9441 artists.



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