I think that you have the right idea. The red cloth looks great! I suspect that your problem is simply that your brushes are too big and are preventing you from painting really neat fine lines. You just need to invest in some really nice wicked tiny brushes. Then you will be getting the high scores.
You don't say how many minis you've painted, but if this is an early attempt at layering then you have the right idea. Now all you need to do is perfect it. The reds on the shirt look really nice, but the face lacks any definition and the bow needs to be much neater.