Commission for a family mbr....what should I do?

lizcam

New member
Well, not a family MBR but THE family mbr.

As I have said before, I\'m getting a divorce from Mr C. We have been fighting over the minis, me saying he can\'t see and it\'s my hobby so I should taqke them and him saying that if it weren\'t for him I never would have gotten into the hobby in the first place and he bought most of them on ebay himself (with money that should have paid the mortgage and half of which was mine but I won\'t re-open that can of worms) so he thinks he should keep them. We\'ve settled by going through them and splitting them down the middle, one for him, one for me.

That having been done he now has the brass eggs to ask me to paint \"his\" portion on commission. Needless to say I have no desire to even contemplate this. He\'s got what he\'s got and I don\'t ever want to see them again.

I was thinking about finding someone to paint the stuff for him. Most of it is old Ral Partha minis and stuff most people here might not be interested in. But then why should I go out of my way to find him someone just to make him happy? Then again, why not when it would make things easier in the long run?

What do you all think I should do?
 

Roger Bunting

New member
Well, it wouldn\'t hurt to just put out a feeler for a painter, kind of like you just did and then put Mr C in touch with him/her and let them sort everything else out.
 

Dragonsreach

Super Moderator
Staff member
Basically you have two choices :

Be the bad girl and say screw him

or

Be the good girl and make a spot on job of them



Which one will make you feel better?
Which one will give you more leverage?

If you want to go the \"I\'ll paint them route\", see how many there are and see if you can divide the labour amongst some friends who\'ll do you a favour.
 

lizcam

New member
My first instinct is to do what Billy says because I\'m bitter about it. But that may just make things harder down the line.

I may just point him in the direction of a painter and let them work it. just step away and take the emotion out of it. But in a way it feels like a cop-out. But then, I\'m sort of spoiling for a fight.
 

squidders

New member
I would just give him the details of artists accepting commissions...

And I would make those details of very high end artists so he\'s getting quotes of $400+ per mini.

Then I would chuckle and move on... neither being of any real help, nor being obnoxious.

Just because he asked, it doesn\'t mean the ball is in your court.
 

No Such Agency

New member
Originally posted by lizcam
My first instinct is to do what Billy says because I\'m bitter about it. But that may just make things harder down the line.

I may just point him in the direction of a painter and let them work it. just step away and take the emotion out of it. But in a way it feels like a cop-out. But then, I\'m sort of spoiling for a fight.
Which is exactly why you should take the high road. IMO :)
 

supervike

Super Moderator
I think you should just say no. Keep it simple, say that you are not interested in doing that.

Why drag on what must be a very stressful time for both of you?
 

Darkmessiah

New member
just tell Mr. C to do one...
let him find his own commissioner, it would be much healthier for u to have nothin to do with him...
 

Wren

Member
You two share a child, and have shared a lot of years. As understandable as it is that you might feel bitter and spoiling for a fight right now, I\'d try to take time to consider about whether that\'s how you\'d always like to feel, or whether you\'d like to keep things civil, maybe even one day possibly friendly.

My parents split up but maintained civil ties. I know there is stuff they don\'t like about each other, but I never felt like I had to choose between them, and they were civil to the point of occasionally having a big shared Thanksgiving. On the other hand, my hubby\'s father refuses to ever see his mother again. It\'s a good thing they were in two separate states when we got married, as we couldn\'t possibly have invited them both.

You seem like the kind of person who\'d like to avoid putting your son in that kind of position. And maybe it\'s possible that Mr. C is asking not just out of greedy desire to have his figures painted but also because he wants to maintain some kind of friendly tie with you? My recommendation would be to tell him you wouldn\'t feel comfortable painting the figs right now, but he could talk to you about it again in 3 or 6 months, and let him know that you\'ll try to help him find someone else to work on the minis if you can\'t.

I think you said he was pretty surprised that you wanted to divorce? Is it at all possible he\'s asking this as a way of staying close to you and hoping you\'ll change your mind. If so, then it\'s better to say no for his sake as well as your sanity.
 

Rodnik

New member
Divorces are nasty business.

I\'d do what my attorney advised me to do and leave it at that.
If there aren\'t attorneys involved, I\'d just take what I thought was mine and leave. If it\'s that big of a deal to him, he can sue you for the minis---which I suspect he probably won\'t do.
 

Ebonbuddha

Active member
Yes. Do what Billy says. But do it while wearing a halter top.

And send me the pictures.;)

Seriously, I think he is doing it to keep in contact with you. Maybe it is hard for him to let go and this is his way of keeping you around.

Originally posted by Highbulp Billy
Tell him you\'ll do it, paint them badly and overcharge him - Win/Win ;)
 

evil tendencies

Cake or Death?
My parents split when I was young, and I still have to deal with the fallout 28 years later; my wedding, in particular, was really problematic. In some ways, I\'ve had to push both of them away from me so that I could stay out of their divorce.

If you play it calm now and don\'t burn bridges (like my parents did) you are going to save yourself a lot of heartache later. Helping him find a painter for commission work might be a gesture you can build on later, and would at least give you the moral high ground right now.

I really hope this whole thing works out for you.
 

krom1415

New member
Well reading this, I\'m feeling that there\'s still,,,,,an attachment going on between you both,,,,,make sure you are doing the right thing as separations are for a long time.

Screw the painting, get sorting out your real feelings, life\'s too short and will be gone all to soon.

Good luck though :D
 

Jike Ichi

New member
I don\'t know how many minis it would be. But if it s only one perhaps you just tell him before you do it: \"THIS will be THE LAST painting I\'ll ever do for you!\"
Then take the job and do it at normal standart.

Well if he is coming to you with hordes of Minis I would tell him to pick one out and that that mini will be your last painting for him.

Sounds fair I think...
 

lizcam

New member
Originally posted by Jike Ichi
I don\'t know how many minis it would be. But if it s only one perhaps you just tell him before you do it: \"THIS will be THE LAST painting I\'ll ever do for you!\"
Then take the job and do it at normal standart.

Well if he is coming to you with hordes of Minis I would tell him to pick one out and that that mini will be your last painting for him.

Sounds fair I think...

We\'re talking thousands and if I did them all I\'d never be able to paint anything else. No time. I think I\'m going to hand him a list of potential painters and let him choose from them. No one has to paint very well. They would be fore table top play and he can\'t see much anyway. If anyone is interested in being on the list just pm me and I\'ll pass the info on.
 

Wren

Member
You might also check your local game store(s) for painters. You\'re more likely to find someone who\'ll do painting for cheap/trade locally would be my guess.
 
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