Dilemma...

[wiccanpony]

Nothing I can really say Matty, other then give you a motherly hug... in one thing you’re right, you are young and have years ahead of you, there will be other chances of landing a good job and should things not work out for Laura and you, there will also be other chances for meeting a soul mate.

In the end you are going to have to dig deep inside you and move toward what will may “you” happy, not rich, not secure but what really makes you “happy’, then work for it.

 

[lizcam]

Poor Matty. I\'ve been there. I stayed with the job and the safe path and where am I now? I\'m getting a divorce after 25 years of marraige. Nothing is a sure thing. Remember that.

There\'s a lot of good advice here but I can only tell you what I personally have experienced.

I had a lot of musical talent when I was young. I was interested in following music as a carreer but my dad, a musician who spent a great deal of his life teaching instead of playing because he was afraid to stretch himself, told me to \"make sure you have something to fall back on\". I\'ve been doing nothing but fall back my whole life and now that I have the courage to step forward I\'m almost too old to do it.

You are young. Jobs will come and go. Even girls will come and go. But chances like this are rare. Grab it with both hands and ride it for all it\'s worth. You have plenty of time to do the settled life in the future but right now you will be making memories and experiences that will broaden your outlook and enrich your life. If I were in your shoes I\'d head to Spain without a moments hesitation. Even if you and Laura don\'t work out you\'ll have so much experience from it that it will be worth it.

Just my two cents. None of us here can make the desision for you.

 

[Onis Lair]

I\'m somethign of a romantic... ok now i\'m ca bitter hateful getting old man but still. I say screww it, you only live once and your and her have been togeather for some time. Take the leap. Jobs will come and go, after all there is no job security in this day and age.

 

[Wombat85]

Well mate you are still young live now b4 you are tied down, just remember : \"I came to a fork in the road and I picked the road less traveled and that has made all the difference\". Robert Frost

 

[Legacy Account]

Originally posted by lizcam

Grab it with both hands and ride it for all it\'s worth.....

This is the best advice you\'ll ever get

I vote for neither the job, nor the woman. They\'re both a ball and chain! Go and sow your oats.... :beer:

 

[supervike]

It\'s so much easier to give the advice than to have to actually make the decision.

I\'m going to be 40 soon, and my life has always been about finding the most comfortable, least controversial, safest route. Don\'t get me wrong, I love my kids and wife, and \'safe\' life....but there is always that \'if only\' thought buried deep.

Don\'t do that to yourself. You\'ve got time to make mistakes...take chances.

I agree about doing it for yourself though....

Material things mean nothing. Stories, memories, and experiences are priceless.

 

[Yramrag]

I am going to add my part and say, if you love her, go and be with her. Jobs are always around but finding that special person, maybe never again.
My wife and i went to Japan to teach (at my choosing) and while we could have stayed there for many years (i loved my work and where we lived in the country), she wanted to come back and work as a psychologist. I complained but never the less i came back. I had gotten a decent job in the city but within 6 months she said she had to move to the country to get experience. I complained but i followed her. She got work as a psych and each year has moved up but also moved closer back to the city. I am lucky with that i have been able to keep the same job working for a good company with an excellent boss who understands exactly what i want to do. But she wanted to move back to the city so i complained, but was ready to follow her. At this time my company was involved with some major construction projects and has teamed up with a multinational company to deliver the works. They have offered me a position that is far better to anything i would have gotten on my own with only an Arts (humanities) degree as a tertiary degree. So while i complained about my wife moving all over the place and dragging me around, it has worked out so well. If i had of left her because i was happy with what i was doing, i wouldn\'t be where i am now.

I say go for the girl and if you are a good and dedicated worker, you can find another great job.

 

[Highbulp Billy]

Oh Matty,

Heart says - \"Get the first plane out there and live your life the way you want to. You\'re young and now is the time to enjoy it with someone you love or on your own\"

Head says - \"Pack your stuff carefully then jump on the plane and live life. You\'ll never regret living life when you\'re young enough to enjoy/survive it. Career-wise, lots of companies like employing people who have broader life experience and who are willing to take risks like this so it may help your future path to have something like this on your CV. Also, you\'ve got your computer and the internet so you should be able to keep up with design work and maybe even freelance a bit.\"

If it falls though, there\'s always people around to help you out, and if it all works out then the beers are on you :beer:

 

[MPJ]

Forget the girl, there\'s lots out there.

If your not gonna like the job then forget that too, there\'s lots of those out there too.

Since your still a youngin and have little to no responsibilities I might suggest going out, getting drunk, getting high, parting, getting sex, painting minis, and whatnot. You got a couple years yet before you need to start getting serious about stuff.

There\'s a time and a place for drugs and alcohol... That time and place is college (or the college years of your life). :drunk:

 

[darklord]

tricky one matty, when i was younger i moved away just to stay with a girl and it didnt work out in the end after 4 1/2 years too, but i do look back at missed opportunities in life that i didnt take and wished i had.
if you are going purely to be with her then some may say its foolish whereas other may say its a sign of love, but from what you have said, the idea of taking off appeals to you anyway. Would you go out there if it wasnt into a relationship? if you were doing it with say a friend or on your own? If so then maybe there is your answer. You are only 20 as you say and you have plenty of time to do the 9 - 5 thing. even if you go out there and find you dont like it you are still young enough to come back and pick up where you left of.

 

[Multifracture]

Dude i\'m 26, two kids, house, job etc. I was working in as a salesman but i recently changed and if your job is saying 5/6 yrs before management its a hunk of *&^£ job and you can get much better. The only regret i have with my life is never being able to tour asia with my wife before our kids were born but again its not a massive regret. I say take any chance you have to do something different because in the end its not about how much money you earned or how good you were at your job (which if you hate you wont be at in 5 yrs anyway) but how you lived your life and how happy you were with the decisions you made.

Ultimately dude people who take risks are happier and there are millions of jobs in the world right now we\'re training people in Uni for jobs that won\'t exist for another 4 yrs! How can you be expected to prepare for that!

Do it dude, do it and don\'t look back because right now life is a gift that\'s why they call it the present

 

[Infidel Castro]

I avoided reading everyone\'s replies so I could tell you what I think you should do:

First of all realise there are more than two choices here - I\'m not trying to be esoterical, but you could walk into a convent tomorrow and become a monk. You might bump into someone who blows your mind and makes you wonder what Laura was all about (you\'ll say nay to that suggestion no doubt, but the point is you never know). You could get hit by a runaway milk-float and end up unable to work and you\'ll be heading in another direction again. I don\'t want to labour the point, but there are decisions you coan make and decisions that might get made for you that supercede the two options in one swoop.

All that said, the only time you\'ll know if the decision you make is the right one is when you\'re looking back in a few years (or maybe months!). As such, I would suggest only one thing: whatever decision you make, make sure it\'s 100%. If, retrospectivley, it might have been the wrong decision, you can still content yourself that you put yourself into that situation in a wholehearted fashion. THat helps.

Having been married and gone through another long-termer, I know that bouncing back can be hard, but the surprising thing is that each time I\'ve bounced back, things have been better than before. That\'s a nice little trick life plays

Good luck, squire!

 

[Jericho]

If I had a chance/reason to be in Spain right now, I would be. Go for it, you\'ll spend a lot of time regretting it if you don\'t.

What\'s the worst thing that could happen? You wind up back at home in a few years, with a ton of experience under your belt and life skills up the wazoo.

 

[Multifracture]

Hell yeah Jericho i completely agree!!!!

 

[matty1001]

Well switched off the computer at about 4am and lay awake until about 6.
Got up at 8, did my excercises, freshened up. Went over to town to the offices for the job. Answered a few questions, and got the job...

...then turned it down.

I\'m going for it, gonna make the big leap. I\'m completely shitting myself but for once in the past week I have a clear head and really feel I have made the right choice.

I really appreciate all the replys and PM\'s (I answer them in a bit) it has really helped to get a bit more perspective on things getting different view points.

Well I\'m off to watch the fast show to brush up on my Spanish skills...here goes nothing!

 

[Undave]

Viva Espana!

Buena suerte :drunk:

 

[Talonicus]

Matty!!!

Read your own words.
You are making all the arguments for going and not staying. You know what you want to do...... so just do it.

Enjoy life as much as possible. Taking the comfortable route makes you short, fat and jug eared..... do you want to be like me?

Just keep in touch.

Oh and give me your minis as a going away present. :innocent::innocent:


oops just noticed i type slow.
Well done that man for being braver than me.

 

[Infidel Castro]

Aye, time for a bit of Julio Geordio!

Peth-eth-eth-eth, peth-eth-eth, Chrissy Waddle!

 

[matty1001]

And I\'m only leaving this:

For this:

And come winter this:

 

[Dragon Forge Design]

And you had to ask us???

Geeze man don\'t let the door hit you on the ass on your way out of Dodge...