Farin
New member
Hi folks
well since everybody seems to enjoy the vasectomy story, and i really need a little distraction from all the work for college (BIG test in atmospheric science in a few months), i thought i tell you the funniest story i ever heard:
One of the guys at my local game store is a neurosurgeon ( we got two surgeons who are playing there - always good to know that some professional is around in case someone is suddenly feeling sick ) who´s working in a private practice here in berlin and one day we start talking about all these medical shows ( i´m a huge scrubs and house fan ) and we ask him how realistic these stories actually are.
\"They´re just squeezed and concentrated. You really have crazy patients or odd things happening, but not that frequent. Maybe every 3 or 4 years or so something like this happens, the rest is routine \"
And then he tells us about thís male patient back from his time in a hospital in east Berlin.
This guy had spent his vacatons in france, and had taken his wife on a trip through the countryside. One day they stop at this farm in the middle of nowhere where they sell homemade grosseries, and they buy a few.
Few weeks after they´re back in berlin this guy is home alone, his wife is out in town and he´s feeling \"sligtly hungry\" ( Or as you folks in the UK say : a bit peckish ) - and since his wife isn´t around to cook, he decides to eat some of the sausage in a jar he bought on the farm.
Later he told the medical staff that \" It tasted a little weird, but he didn´t mind \".
So he eats nearly the entire jar.
An hour later he walks into the reception of the hospital, barely able to walk in a straight line and in pain - and after a few steps he drops at the floor and turns blue.
Lucky for him, a resdient was arround and started to intubate him, saving his life. They bring him to the ICU and run a few tests and find out that this guy has botox in his system - it had srtarted paralizing his muscles and so he was unable to breath and move.
Aparently this french sausage had been poorly stored and turned into a petri dish for bacteria.
There wasn´t much the docs could do besides intubating him - they knew that with time the toxin would wear of - and so they waited for several weeks, always monitoring this guy. And during the whole time the guy was consciousness,paralyzed, unable to do anythign but watching telly.
And after some weeks they can finally extubate him. And what´s the first thing he says , right after stopping to cough ?
This whole crap is my wife´s fault !! She wasn´t arround to cook for me, so i had to eat that shit! it´s her task to cook for me!
Fortunately, his familly wasn´t arround to hear him and the nurses and docs could convonvince him NOT to blame his wife, who had been worried about him all the time.
So what do we learn kids ?
As a doc you sometimes have to save giant jackasses.
Some people seem not to be able to admit when they made a fault.
And most important, if somethings smells like a bears armpit DON`T EAT IT !
well since everybody seems to enjoy the vasectomy story, and i really need a little distraction from all the work for college (BIG test in atmospheric science in a few months), i thought i tell you the funniest story i ever heard:
One of the guys at my local game store is a neurosurgeon ( we got two surgeons who are playing there - always good to know that some professional is around in case someone is suddenly feeling sick ) who´s working in a private practice here in berlin and one day we start talking about all these medical shows ( i´m a huge scrubs and house fan ) and we ask him how realistic these stories actually are.
\"They´re just squeezed and concentrated. You really have crazy patients or odd things happening, but not that frequent. Maybe every 3 or 4 years or so something like this happens, the rest is routine \"
And then he tells us about thís male patient back from his time in a hospital in east Berlin.
This guy had spent his vacatons in france, and had taken his wife on a trip through the countryside. One day they stop at this farm in the middle of nowhere where they sell homemade grosseries, and they buy a few.
Few weeks after they´re back in berlin this guy is home alone, his wife is out in town and he´s feeling \"sligtly hungry\" ( Or as you folks in the UK say : a bit peckish ) - and since his wife isn´t around to cook, he decides to eat some of the sausage in a jar he bought on the farm.
Later he told the medical staff that \" It tasted a little weird, but he didn´t mind \".
So he eats nearly the entire jar.
An hour later he walks into the reception of the hospital, barely able to walk in a straight line and in pain - and after a few steps he drops at the floor and turns blue.
Lucky for him, a resdient was arround and started to intubate him, saving his life. They bring him to the ICU and run a few tests and find out that this guy has botox in his system - it had srtarted paralizing his muscles and so he was unable to breath and move.
Aparently this french sausage had been poorly stored and turned into a petri dish for bacteria.
There wasn´t much the docs could do besides intubating him - they knew that with time the toxin would wear of - and so they waited for several weeks, always monitoring this guy. And during the whole time the guy was consciousness,paralyzed, unable to do anythign but watching telly.
And after some weeks they can finally extubate him. And what´s the first thing he says , right after stopping to cough ?
This whole crap is my wife´s fault !! She wasn´t arround to cook for me, so i had to eat that shit! it´s her task to cook for me!
Fortunately, his familly wasn´t arround to hear him and the nurses and docs could convonvince him NOT to blame his wife, who had been worried about him all the time.
So what do we learn kids ?
As a doc you sometimes have to save giant jackasses.
Some people seem not to be able to admit when they made a fault.
And most important, if somethings smells like a bears armpit DON`T EAT IT !
