How to deal with stress/anxiety...

supervike

Super Moderator
Anyone got any tips for me?

I've taken a new position at my company, and it is very complex, and there is oodles to learn.

Any how, long story short, it's given me alot of stress and anxiety. Butterflies in my stomach, can't relax, can't get my mind off of it, not sleeping well.

This happened to me several years ago, where I took a different job, but the stress/anxiety got the better of me, it spun me into a very bad place and luckily I was able to get out of that job after about 6 months. It took me a long time to get over that.

I'm determined not to let it have control over me this time, and want to be more proactive, thus the plea for help...
 

finn17

New member
Finish work on time....go to the nearest pub near your home...have no more than two drinks whilst completing a moderately serious crossword....go home.

Works for me....:)


EDIT: You can top this up at home if you like with an hours killing/maiming aliens etc on the console of your choice.
 

Torn blue sky

New member
Yeah gaming is a pretty good escape for me when i'm feeling a bit under. Killing pixelated baddies is a fantastic passtime....Very sooooothing. Portal and Portal 2 are also great to unwind, thinking puzzley and less dakka.
 

freakinacage

Well-known member
paint

battlefield bad company 2 (although gonna get 3 when it comes out)

just chill, ie read, switch off in front of a film
 

generulpoleaxe

New member
Find something you like doing that whilst you're doing it the world can go &^%$ itself. It's how I get through depression when it rears it's ugly head.
 

PegaZus

Stealth Freak
I really didn't know what to write, but then I came up with at least something.

Talk to your boss. Seriously. My mother got put into a managerial position, and she kept her mouth shut about her feelings and worries and such. When it came to annual reviews, she finally just burst out that she really didn't feel like she knew what she was doing, felt she was failing everybody, and was thinking of quitting. Her boss didn't know she'd never managed people before, and had just assumed she knew what to do. A year's worth of training and mentoring followed, and she felt a lot better.

Now, you may not be in the same situation, but it never hurts to let the guy signing your paycheck know what's going on in your head. They might have a solution.

Sounds like a corporate rag, I know, but there it is.
 

Wyrmypops

New member
One practical thing I've picked up, avoid caffeine. It can play merry hell with your serotonin levels. Switch from coffee to tea, or coke to some fruit based soda.
It might be worth a trip to the doctor for some mild treatment. If it ain't too dire you shouldn't be offered any of the heavier drugs, just something to take the edge off. Though a group therapy could be suitable, affirming that a lot of people have similar issues and shared experiences.

More managble coping strategies, they're beyond me. That's why I've spent the last ten years in a slump. Do what you can before it takes hold, by then it's a bugger to get out of the rut as even visiting the doc to get the treatment you need is difficult.
 

10 ball

New member
I go jogging it really seems to help. You get a restart with your brain after and
Will be able to think clearly.
 

Spoontoes

New member
As was said above, find something that 'removes' you from your current status and enables you to 'release' the stressed state. Options:

Yoga (my wife does this religiously, swears by it and she gets badly stressed by most everything (seriously).
Excercise, ju-jitsu used to do this for me until I injured my shoulder such that I can't really do anything very active much (still looking though), other options are running and gymn work, or bag work.
Alcohol - not recommended on a regular basis but sometimes I use it for a bit of a mental 'reboot'
Painting - this works brilliantly for me now, I have to concentrate and yet still relax to get anywhere near a half decent application of paint that it sends me into a different zone.
Music - playing (I'd imagine smacking a set of drums for 20 mins will detension most people) or listening too, if you find the right tracks that can zone you out just sit and do that.
Writing/Reading - as above, keeping a blog for yourself of how you are doing may be cathartic.

And finally, try to bear in mind that no matter what the job is, it isn't as important as your wellness of self. All things in moderation.

Hope some of the above helps a bit, look after yourself!
 

megazord_man

New member
A lot of the answers address the symptoms not the cause.

Firstly moving jobs especially to a complex one can be and is normally stressful. In my mind it's showing that you care for what you are doing which moving forward is vitally important. Coming from a position where I manage 65 people in an extremely complex environment (we design satellites and spacecraft) I have experienced and see this type of thing.

To my mind there are a number of things you can do to address the cause;

Talk to your boss (as someone else said) on a regular basis, try to go for weekly review. Talk about what you have done, going to do including why and how. Ask questions, ask lots of questions and reflect the answer back to the person you asked. It will cement the answer in your mind and will enable the person to correct any misunderstanding you may have. Through the week write down anything you don't understand and challenge yourself to find out the answer. You'll probably find many people in the organisation don't know the answer to the things you're seeing as strange, complex or difficult. Also write doing the specific things that are causing the stress and address each one in turn in the appropriate way, be it reading company documentation, talking to someone, reading advice online or some thing else altogether.

Ask for a mentor, someone who is very good at what you do, who's open and willing to help you in the initial months. Realise that it will take time for you to settle in, you can't know or understand everything straight away.

Once you've do those things you should then do things to relax you in mind and spirit.
 

Kalidane

New member
megazord_man said better what I was mentally drafting.

I started a high stress role and had the same feelings for months but through a combination of finding answers (seldom from colleagues sadly), finding a great mentor, monthly chats with a great manager and always striving to improve those feelings dissipated.

Also when I realised I was often so hung over after two hours sleep that I couldn't remember getting to work but I was still doing my job well that I must be reasonably on top of things. Work wise anyway. There was still the raging alchoholism issue lol
 

ischa

New member
I heard some people mentioning alcohol and gaming, those are not very good. May be good for short-time stressor, but not for someone like you, who´s new to a demanding job=P gaming means you will sit in front of a computer, which is really bad if stressed. Best tips i can give you is excersise and facing the stress. Sleeping well also helps alot, sun/vitamin d will help you. Painting can help as a sort of relaxation, but dont spend too much time, 45 minutes of focused painting per hour, without telly on or rough music, and then 15 minutes of moving around is a great way. Meditation or real relaxation is great, just sit straight and listen to your own breath or water.

but the most imortant things are excercise and proper sleep, it will get your brain fresh and healthyP
 

minimart

New member
funny how personal stress becomes, dealing with stress is so often a matter of transference. Sliding it off or displacing the stress really is not quite the same as dealing with it face on. Stress is kind of like weight lifting in a sense. The more we deal with it the stronger we become. For me stress relief is actually a matter of doing what I can to take control. So many of the suggestions and strategies here are part of the relief of stress and are an incredibly valuable part of maintaining the sanity as we deal with stress. One other aspect that is the prevention/reduction of stress has been well covered by PegaZus. By communicating your desire to improve and become better as ably described by megazord_man. These are such great tools in the reduction of work related stress. All stress in live is cumulative....all relationships, work, home, recreation, all the pressures add up. Sharing as appropriate the stresses that you have with your spouse and developing means to cope that also involve your family will aid a great deal with the stress. After all some of the greatest stresses form work come in thinking about the impact that work failure will have on the home front. There is no greater source of support than our spouse ( at least i hope so ) Our greatest supports should not be neglected in the process of communication, and in this way we individually are better enabling ourselves to deal with stress........
 

Shawn R. L.

New member
Didn't read every post but here's some stuff I've found helpful.

Exercise that really gets your heart pumping. It burns up some of that anxious energy and increases the endorphin levels. I do brisk walking.

Sugar can in the short run make you feel better but in the long run, too much can put one in a bad space both physically and mentally.

I've found a lot of comfort in the Psalms in the Bible.

Write list's of what's on your mind.....everything, even if it seems trivial write it down. This can really help get you out of your thoughts.

GET REST. If you need sleep meds, use em. When I'm really up against it they really come in handy. I cut them in 1/4's and take it about 1-2 hours before bedtime. Gives the med time to kick in and lessens the minor hangover sleep meds can leave you with.

Look into modifying what you're doing at work or the type of work you're doing.

Talk...........
 

Wicksy

New member
Exercise is a great way deal with stress. The hormones released when the body is stressed (which make you feel ill/bad etc..) are burned off and their production is stunted. Sleep well. I got really bad when i was function off 3-4 hours sleep a night. Too much forums and not enough rest. Now i need a consistent 6 hours at least or i'm i'll.

I'd advise against any form of medication unless absolutely nessacary as it will become habit forming, which ultimately can stress you out more. My mother became addicted to Vallium such that she got panic attacks before bed if she didnt take one. She had to be weaned off that with something else and that prolonged her anxiety somewhat. Also, dont take your work home with you. Leave it at the work door. I relax by painting. It soughted me out a treat. It focuses me away from my problems and allows my mind to relax and attain some sought of balance.
 

skraaal

New member
I've written something out for you as a number of Private Messages, I hope you find it helpful.

All the best,
Axel.
 

me_in_japan

New member
I cant help but agree with everyone here, particularly with ischa where he says "but the most imortant things are excercise and proper sleep, it will get your brain fresh and healthy"

I've found that when I get stressed/overworked, I come home from work really exhausted, but I start to force myself to do stuff which should help me relax. Play computer games, paint, whatever. But, this in itself starts to become a source of stress. It's because I don't want to be the guy who goes to work, comes home knackered, sleeps, goes to work, comes home knackered, sleeps, and so on. I try to break it up with some personal time. BUT this is self defeating. Sometimes a good night's sleep can make all the difference. I think it's important to remember that how you feel today about something may not be how you feel about it tomorrow after you've had a rest. Sleep when your body tells you to. That's what I've learned. Hope that helps :)
 

Dragonsreach

Super Moderator
Staff member
Anyone got any tips for me?
I've taken a new position at my company, and it is very complex, and there is oodles to learn.
Any how, long story short, it's given me alot of stress and anxiety. Butterflies in my stomach, can't relax, can't get my mind off of it, not sleeping well.
I'm determined not to let it have control over me this time, and want to be more proactive, thus the plea for help...

For the job approach it one bite at a time.
Seriously though you have to remember that work is there to allow you to live the way you want to, not to be your life.
Learn to segment the tasks into chunks, it makes them more managable and easier to deal with.
Do as Finn suggests finish on time as often as possible.

I'll give you the only piece of advice I can to relax; If you haven't got one, get a dog.
Something with a good soft coat like a Golden retriever, spend time walking, grooming and stroking it. Then do the same with the missus.
Its no good taking the stress home, that only leads to a self fullfilling spiral of tension.
I've taken the attitude that I'm as professional and focussed as I can be on my job. But as soon as I walk out the door WORK STOPS.
Which is Why I've refused Point Blank to work from home. Try to do the same.
 
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