This year is starting out completely awesome despite the first day of the year consisting of cleaning and taking care of everything from the dinner yesterday.
Here's the story:
Several months ago I started feeling kind of miserable in my relationship, I felt neglected and generally avoided. I was not a happy cat. Time passed and she stopped saying goodbye when she left home, she started flinching when I tried to kiss her and walked around me when I asked for hugs...
After a while I stopped feeling miserable about it and got into some state of acceptance, "this is going to end" but decided to get the most out of it until the end at least, I still loved her after all, even if it might not be mutual any longer.
With me getting a new job and her starting at the University we both got schedules that pushed us farther apart and we didn't really see each other despite living together and I was even more sure that it would end and that soon.
But some time ago I felt that this wouldn't do. I felt that I owed myself something more than tired acceptance to end it with. After all, with what we went through to get together I felt that it just wouldn't do with letting it fade like that and I decided to try to get close again. Actually, this was much thanks to the chain mail story that was posted here a while ago, I think it was by Jesters....
It felt awkward at first, kinda like picking up someone at the bar while being sober but without that awesome tingle you get for trying something new. It started slow, I forced myself to stop my usual routine when I got home from work and instead sat down beside her while she was at her computer and simply just kept her company, later I asked if I could join her watching cartoons (she's completely into the Japanese Anime cartoons) and we cuddled closer and closer as the days passed until the day before yesterday where I (almost as nervous as the first time) leaned towards her and gave her a kiss to test... And she answered. The jump of joy my heart made then was worth more than anything I can describe.
And this morning we finally had that talk we should have had so many months ago and I found out that she was just as frustrated about it as I was, we had managed to stop listening to each other and started taking each other for granted. She's been hugging me spontaneously and been jumping around the flat all day, just like the girl I once got to know and fell in love with, she's looking happy again after so many months of hardly looking me in the eyes at all... I can't even begin to describe how that feels.
Please take care of your loved ones, I know I will from now on. I've never felt so happy when going through a whole day with cleaning and dish washing.
Here's the story:
Several months ago I started feeling kind of miserable in my relationship, I felt neglected and generally avoided. I was not a happy cat. Time passed and she stopped saying goodbye when she left home, she started flinching when I tried to kiss her and walked around me when I asked for hugs...
After a while I stopped feeling miserable about it and got into some state of acceptance, "this is going to end" but decided to get the most out of it until the end at least, I still loved her after all, even if it might not be mutual any longer.
With me getting a new job and her starting at the University we both got schedules that pushed us farther apart and we didn't really see each other despite living together and I was even more sure that it would end and that soon.
But some time ago I felt that this wouldn't do. I felt that I owed myself something more than tired acceptance to end it with. After all, with what we went through to get together I felt that it just wouldn't do with letting it fade like that and I decided to try to get close again. Actually, this was much thanks to the chain mail story that was posted here a while ago, I think it was by Jesters....
It felt awkward at first, kinda like picking up someone at the bar while being sober but without that awesome tingle you get for trying something new. It started slow, I forced myself to stop my usual routine when I got home from work and instead sat down beside her while she was at her computer and simply just kept her company, later I asked if I could join her watching cartoons (she's completely into the Japanese Anime cartoons) and we cuddled closer and closer as the days passed until the day before yesterday where I (almost as nervous as the first time) leaned towards her and gave her a kiss to test... And she answered. The jump of joy my heart made then was worth more than anything I can describe.
And this morning we finally had that talk we should have had so many months ago and I found out that she was just as frustrated about it as I was, we had managed to stop listening to each other and started taking each other for granted. She's been hugging me spontaneously and been jumping around the flat all day, just like the girl I once got to know and fell in love with, she's looking happy again after so many months of hardly looking me in the eyes at all... I can't even begin to describe how that feels.
Please take care of your loved ones, I know I will from now on. I've never felt so happy when going through a whole day with cleaning and dish washing.
