cassar
BALLSCRATCHER
the ball n chain decided we should go for a run today (thats a drive for anyone from the rest of the world) so dropping everyhing we took off, i decided to head for the beach and go for a play in the sand dunes (thats off roading in the range rover). strange rovers (called that because you have to be strange to own one) are like drug addictions, expensive bad habbits almost impossible to kick, when they work you feel great but when they dont your on a downer and nothing but forking out will help. any way i digress to get back to the point, the boss again decided that i had had more fun than was good for me and told me to head for the local diy store, (which proves that when something good happens the universe makes something bad happen to even things up) resigned to my fate i drove down the beach toward the exit contemplating what delights awaited me, something involving paint or re landscaping the garden no doubt.
as we approached the exit i saw a small blue car parked on the beach in front of us we drove past and i further noticed that the car was not should we say parked in the traditional manner namley supported by the wheels instead it was resting on its floor the wheels being half burried in the sand. i stopped seeing one last oppertunity for some fun and asked the wife to speak to the blue cars occupants and see i they needed a tow. she gave me the obligatory dirty you're going to make a twonk out of yourself look before speaking to the young girls in the car who where indeed stuck. i positioned the rangey got out the tow hinch and connected it up instucting the young girl who's head was hanging out of the drivers side window to take it out of gear and let the handbrake off. i then jumped into the rangy and pulled away, i was a little surprised to say the least when i came to a sudden halt and proceeded to dig my way to australia, i stopped reversed out of the holes i was in and repositioned the jeep on a fresh bit of sand i got back in where the wife, god bless her gave me the look and said "well done you dosey twonk, you're going to make a tit out of yourself". not to be deturred i put the rangey into low ratio (in low ratio these things can pull the nickers off a nun) so fully confident i again sallied forth managing to dragg the blue car about nine feet before once again heading for oz via the earths core. stopped again i got out and looked back the blue car contrary to the laws of physics hadnt raised up out of the holes it was in but had lumberd along behind me digging out a couple of trenches that ww1 vets would have been proud of.
a little bit flusterd now i approached the girls in the car and saw why the little itsy bitsy blue car was giving me such trouble, the girls where big, i mean really really big, if they had stood too close together on the beach they could have influenced the tide big. thrown off and a little embarrassedby this, the girls put me out of my misery and volunteerd to get out and push this time. i retreated to the jeep mumbling by way of an apology that they shouldnt come on the beach at this time as the sand was too soft. the wife looked at me and said "no wonder" to which i took a fit of nervous giggles i again repositioned myself on a flat piece of sand before proceeding to tow the car all the way to the beach entrance no problem at all.
so if you are an irresistable force and you come across an imovable object my advice put your head down and drive on or ask it to get out and push.. im now sanding down all the garden furniture as well as re landscaping which also goes o prove one good turn definatley doesnt deserve another.
thanks for yor time and patience.
as we approached the exit i saw a small blue car parked on the beach in front of us we drove past and i further noticed that the car was not should we say parked in the traditional manner namley supported by the wheels instead it was resting on its floor the wheels being half burried in the sand. i stopped seeing one last oppertunity for some fun and asked the wife to speak to the blue cars occupants and see i they needed a tow. she gave me the obligatory dirty you're going to make a twonk out of yourself look before speaking to the young girls in the car who where indeed stuck. i positioned the rangey got out the tow hinch and connected it up instucting the young girl who's head was hanging out of the drivers side window to take it out of gear and let the handbrake off. i then jumped into the rangy and pulled away, i was a little surprised to say the least when i came to a sudden halt and proceeded to dig my way to australia, i stopped reversed out of the holes i was in and repositioned the jeep on a fresh bit of sand i got back in where the wife, god bless her gave me the look and said "well done you dosey twonk, you're going to make a tit out of yourself". not to be deturred i put the rangey into low ratio (in low ratio these things can pull the nickers off a nun) so fully confident i again sallied forth managing to dragg the blue car about nine feet before once again heading for oz via the earths core. stopped again i got out and looked back the blue car contrary to the laws of physics hadnt raised up out of the holes it was in but had lumberd along behind me digging out a couple of trenches that ww1 vets would have been proud of.
a little bit flusterd now i approached the girls in the car and saw why the little itsy bitsy blue car was giving me such trouble, the girls where big, i mean really really big, if they had stood too close together on the beach they could have influenced the tide big. thrown off and a little embarrassedby this, the girls put me out of my misery and volunteerd to get out and push this time. i retreated to the jeep mumbling by way of an apology that they shouldnt come on the beach at this time as the sand was too soft. the wife looked at me and said "no wonder" to which i took a fit of nervous giggles i again repositioned myself on a flat piece of sand before proceeding to tow the car all the way to the beach entrance no problem at all.
so if you are an irresistable force and you come across an imovable object my advice put your head down and drive on or ask it to get out and push.. im now sanding down all the garden furniture as well as re landscaping which also goes o prove one good turn definatley doesnt deserve another.
thanks for yor time and patience.
