I agree that new friends would probably be optimal. Ideally new friends you could both share and have to do \'couple\' things with and with whom you could exchange support for being in a committed relationship. (So people who\'d work for venting but would know when to keep what to themselves sort of thing.) Sadly, ideals aren\'t always possible. But it\'s worth working towards if there\'s anyone at all likely you know.
I\'d be hesitant to recommend putting your foot down on getting rid of the friend. Even if someone is absolutely, totally in the right in a situation like that, it can so look/feel controlling and domineering to the spouse or anyone the spouse complains about it to. Also one of those situations where people tend to fight for something harder the more you try to push them away from it.
Even if you can\'t have couple friends, are there ways you could spend general time with more couples? Work events, time with extended family, church, anything like that? Sounds like you\'re a pretty good husband compared with many, and maybe all she needs to appreciate you more is a little time hearing the myriad of complaints a lot of wives have about forgetting holidays and never being thoughtful.
You say you\'ve talked to your wife about the miniature thing, so I won\'t suggest that again, other than to check if you\'ve talked with her in general about problems/feelings. Sometimes people are snide or erupt over one thing when it\'s really about something completely different. Also I\'m assuming you didn\'t fling any sprue or static grass or whatever into her keyboard and the dishes weren\'t just to get you back or something.
But maybe you should try talking to the friend again, sounds like it worked at least a little in the holiday incident. I don\'t really know anything about this guy other than he\'s gay and doesn\'t know where the line between playful teasing and aggravating people is. But I\'d say you can use both of those to your advantage. I\'m assuming being gay carries at least some stigma in Korea, maybe it doesn\'t. It\'s massive hyperbole to compare the stigma people put on homosexuality with the static you\'re getting about painting minis, but it might be the kind of comparison that would drill something through his head.
Next time the friend starts the \'why do you paint them/I don\'t understand\' dialogue, maybe try \'why do you suck guys off, I don\'t understand\'. But then point out that although you don\'t personally understand or ever want to do that, you accept that he does and you aren\'t constantly bugging him about it or running him down in front of other people for his preference, could he maybe give you and your hobbies the same consideration.
