My latest Pet Peeves...
- Thread starter supervike
- Start date
This week they found several skeletons along with a pair of manacles and a ships bell in the Bristol Channel.... and promptly declare that they must be the remains of slaves. I\'m sure the only reason that a ship would have a pair of manacles on board would be to restrain slaves. This spurious bit of conjecturing is then promptly leaked to the press inciting the black community to declare shennanigans and demand the return of the bones to Africa. Meanwhile they find out that the bones in fact belonged to a white British person (but don\'t really bother to inform anyone about it) and that the record of the ship in questions last voyage had been falsified. This is immediately obvious as the thread affixing the relevent page to the binding is made of nylon and it\'s completely unheard of for old books to be repaired if the odd page comes loose.
[forehead slap]The forger went to the trouble of aquiring period paper and ink but then carelessly decided to bind the page in with a bit of nylon [/forehead slap]
Of course while this is going on an Obama-a-like character is on a personal quest to uncover the story of a bunch of escaped slaves and how they saved Washingtons life and singlehandedly won the American War of Independence (using a magic sword) despite the fact that all the people who have previously tried to investigate it have been murdered. This fact did inject a bit of hope as there was a chance that some of the characters would meet a sticky end. No such luck unfortunately, as the small army of assassins made the oh so common mistake of shining the red dot laser sight at the targets chest until everyone notices it and dives for cover. Presumably the hitmen were so embarassed by this that they all just buggered off as soon as the return fire started leaving Obama-a-like to escape unscathed, reveal his revolutionary findings to the world and become the next President of the USA.
Next week: Boudicca marries Roman Emperor, conquers Atlantis (using a magic sword) and invents the internet and global warming. All this deduced from a bent nail and a bit of grafitti that reads \"Bouds luvs Nero\"!
[forehead slap]The forger went to the trouble of aquiring period paper and ink but then carelessly decided to bind the page in with a bit of nylon [/forehead slap]
Of course while this is going on an Obama-a-like character is on a personal quest to uncover the story of a bunch of escaped slaves and how they saved Washingtons life and singlehandedly won the American War of Independence (using a magic sword) despite the fact that all the people who have previously tried to investigate it have been murdered. This fact did inject a bit of hope as there was a chance that some of the characters would meet a sticky end. No such luck unfortunately, as the small army of assassins made the oh so common mistake of shining the red dot laser sight at the targets chest until everyone notices it and dives for cover. Presumably the hitmen were so embarassed by this that they all just buggered off as soon as the return fire started leaving Obama-a-like to escape unscathed, reveal his revolutionary findings to the world and become the next President of the USA.
Next week: Boudicca marries Roman Emperor, conquers Atlantis (using a magic sword) and invents the internet and global warming. All this deduced from a bent nail and a bit of grafitti that reads \"Bouds luvs Nero\"!
We could all get jobs as scriptwriters for the BBC!
NEXT next week:
After finding a chipped mug near a church, the team declares it\'s finding of the Holy grail - which was obviously used by the Evil knights Templar for drinking tea - which explains the ring stains.
The Religious community hails the find as miraculous, and the nearest beardy guy seen by the pope is lauded as the second coming.
Unfortunately for everyone, that beardy guy is Michael Moore, who proceeds to lecture everyone about how bad everything is.
Next next next week: The spear of destiny is found in a chip shop in Romford.
NEXT next week:
After finding a chipped mug near a church, the team declares it\'s finding of the Holy grail - which was obviously used by the Evil knights Templar for drinking tea - which explains the ring stains.
The Religious community hails the find as miraculous, and the nearest beardy guy seen by the pope is lauded as the second coming.
Unfortunately for everyone, that beardy guy is Michael Moore, who proceeds to lecture everyone about how bad everything is.
Next next next week: The spear of destiny is found in a chip shop in Romford.
Did they ever bother to explain who offed the black doctor or are we supposed to assume the piss poor assassins did it?
And another thing. The senator has completely abandoned his campaign amidst accusations of cowardice and unpatriotic behavior to go stalking British archaeologists on the other side of the planet just so he can find a watch, yet its treated as a foregone conclusion that he\'s going to win?
And another thing. The senator has completely abandoned his campaign amidst accusations of cowardice and unpatriotic behavior to go stalking British archaeologists on the other side of the planet just so he can find a watch, yet its treated as a foregone conclusion that he\'s going to win?
mattsterbenz
New member
Ants.
The kitchen is currently infested with them. I laid some poison outside, but I don\'t even see any of them out there. They are coming up from the baseboard next to the dishwasher. Must have the hive under the foundation. :flame:
At least the ones inside the house are eating the bait. But it\'s not very comforting knowing that there\'s a hundred ants on the floor. I did have some good fun with the vacuum.
Maybe I\'ll spray some WD40 on the ground and light \'em on fire.
-Matt
The kitchen is currently infested with them. I laid some poison outside, but I don\'t even see any of them out there. They are coming up from the baseboard next to the dishwasher. Must have the hive under the foundation. :flame:
At least the ones inside the house are eating the bait. But it\'s not very comforting knowing that there\'s a hundred ants on the floor. I did have some good fun with the vacuum.
Maybe I\'ll spray some WD40 on the ground and light \'em on fire.
-Matt
mattsterbenz
New member
Hmm, pine oil. I\'ll give that a try. Have to pick some up tomorrow. Thanks for the tip 
-Matt
-Matt
BB pellets.
Some *&^%%* gits thrown Thousands of the Damn things in a road in Liverpool.
Makes driving a bit \"hairy\" Certainly wouldn\'t want to be on a Motorcyle going through that.
Some *&^%%* gits thrown Thousands of the Damn things in a road in Liverpool.
Makes driving a bit \"hairy\" Certainly wouldn\'t want to be on a Motorcyle going through that.
