Perfectionsim?

[Arma]

Hi folks, random babbling time. I don't know what it is with me sometimes but often I always try to seek perfectionism when I know that I don't have the time or effort to achieve it leading to a fair degree of frustration. It only generally takes grip when it's something I feel that I'm good at (but then don't "achieve" a result I'm happy with). If it's something I take less pride in then it doesn't affect me at all.

An example; I love playing fighting games which are a staple in arcades here in Japan. Japan is arguably (in fact, probably) best at these kind of games. I consider myself a good player too but in Japan, if you're not on point, you're dead. I know I can be a v good player (in fact I was when I had time) and I want to get better but I know I don't have the time to put into the game anymore due to family and work commitments. However, I love playing, so much that I don't want to quit but I also HATE to lose. So I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. I can't practice much, but I don't want to quit.

It's similar with painting though to a lesser degree since it's not competitive (as much). Bodybuilding is another one.

I know the answer, I need to realize it's just fun and should always be just fun.... but how?

Oops spelt the title wrong :/

 

[supervike]

First of all, the mispelling of the title is irony at it's finest.

But, I do understand what you mean. I suppose there is nothing wrong with striving for perfect results. Somewhere along the lines, accepting your own limitations and realizing that non-perfect results does NOT equal failure is an important consideration.

Again, nothing wrong with pushing yourself and your limits, but if that becomes your only goal, then you may have missed the enjoyment of the process.

 

[finn17]

What you describe is perfectly normal, but it tends to diminish with age

It will certainly diminish when you have kids, as you'll transfer those feelings to them

Being 'perfect', or even extremely good at anything normally comes with an incredibly high price, say 10,000 hours of practice according to the research. It's generally far more beneficial to be a jack-of-all-trades IMO.

 

[supervike]

Thats a great point about the age (and the children) I believe I'm experiencing that right now.

BTW, don't you sleep?

 

[Arma]

But, I do understand what you mean. I suppose there is nothing wrong with striving for perfect results. Somewhere along the lines, accepting your own limitations and realizing that non-perfect results does NOT equal failure is an important consideration.

Again, nothing wrong with pushing yourself and your limits, but if that becomes your only goal, then you may have missed the enjoyment of the process.

Without a doubt, it's just the "learning" part that is hard

I've definately mellowed with age, but some part of me still wants to be 18! (I'm 31 now). I really think it's just a matter of learning to accept that my free time to develop those skills is all but gone until my wee man is more grown up. Not that that's a problem at all, becoming a Father was easily the best thing that happened to me (and he'll be able to hold a brush etc soon!)

 

[10 ball]

I think your forgetting that you should be enjoying what your doing

 

[QuietiManes]

There's more than just physical prowess that kills a gamers career in their early twenties...is there no alternate avenue you could pursue? Xbox, PS3, PC all have fighting games...I recommend PC because they're the best...obviously. They have all that stuff in Japan, don't they? Or is online gaming restricted?

 

[nels0nmac]

My advice would be to accept your limitations. Being a professional modelmaker for 12 years taught me a lot about limitations. I know that each time a model came my way I would strive to make it perfect each time. However time and budget limitations quite often got in the way but, every now and then I did produce a model that I thought of as being as perfect as I could do.
So to summise.... go for perfection, it's great when you achieve it, but be realistic enough to realise that most of the time you'll have to settle for slightly less, which is still good nonetheless.

 

[Wyrmypops]

Strive to perfect your quest for perfection. Channel it, don't explode with too much being taken on, restrict yourself to realistic goals.

If you approach every little thing as a "this must be the best thing ever", you're setting yourself up for falls and a liklihood or burning yourself out.

Instead of obsessing over all the various choices you'll make, let most of them be fun. Most of them, just pick the colour combination and technique you know you do well with, enjoy the results as evidence of your skills. Success in that regard is good for the ego.

With most of the painting going that way, you can focus on one thing you want to perfect. Be it trying a new paint combination, blending technique, thinning product, basing idea, palette change, varnish, whatever. With less things demanding ones attention you can better focus on the thing you've chosen to improve. It works out better to chart your progress too, as you have evidence all around it of your other skills, the things you haven't changed and can compare them against this new trick you've gone for.

 

[TrystanGST]

Wyrmypops is right. As someone wise once told me, "there will always be another mini". I've struggled with this a bit myself, but realized that my desire to make sure the minis were perfect (thanks to cmon and the fine specimens on display here) was going to result in them never getting painted! So better to get on with it, and use what you've learned on the next one.

 

[MiniStalker83]

I pretty much agree with Trystan. There will always be someone better, and you cannot learn unless you try. Failure is the best teacher in the world. I used to always strive for the best custom rapid prototyping mini's and finding just the right set. But there is not perfect set. You just have to get out there and do it.

 

[cassar]

im as close to perfection as its possible to get........according to the wife...who was standing next to me when she said it.....not sure if there's a compliment there?... ermm no not really.

 

[dogfacedboy uk1]

An example; I love playing fighting games which are a staple in arcades here in Japan. Japan is arguably (in fact, probably) best at these kind of games. I consider myself a good player too but in Japan, if you're not on point, you're dead. I know I can be a v good player (in fact I was when I had time) and I want to get better but I know I don't have the time to put into the game anymore due to family and work commitments. However, I love playing, so much that I don't want to quit but I also HATE to lose. So I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. I can't practice much, but I don't want to quit.

Oh I smell a challenge...................... (not from me, I was pretty good at soul calibur though at one time and marvel vs capcom)

dfb

 

[Dragonsreach]

I've definately mellowed with age, but some part of me still wants to be 18! (I'm 31 now).
Insert you own insulting comment about whippersnappers here!

I really think it's just a matter of learning to accept that my free time to develop those skills is all but gone until my wee man is more grown up.
Not that that's a problem at all, becoming a Father was easily the best thing that happened to me (and he'll be able to hold a brush etc soon!)
Being Honest I think you're missing the point, becoming perfect at a video game isn't important anymore, you've got something much more important to concentrate on,....... BEING A FATHER.
Doesn't matter with that role if you're not perfect, only be the best and imperfect one that you can be for your son.
My dad's made error and is certainly not perfect, but hells teeth ain't no one like him on the planet for me.

................

 

[Einion]

So I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. I can't practice much, but I don't want to quit.

Solo play not an option? In fairness some things are 100% better and more challenging with human opponents, but at least there's some challenge with certain games set at a really high level.

You said something further up that's pretty important here I think, that this seeking perfection is only an issue for things that you feel you're good at. That is pretty natural anyway for a lot of us, but perhaps it would help to just know you're good, rather than having to be 'perfect'... which is anyways an unachievable goal.

It might help to remember the mantra: there's always someone better.

It's similar with painting though to a lesser degree since it's not competitive (as much). Bodybuilding is another one.

Painting at least I think is something you don't fall way behind on if you don't do it for a while or enough. Skills do atrophy, but not in the way a bulked-up muscle does :smile-big:

I know the answer, I need to realize it's just fun and should always be just fun.... but how?

Keep on repeating that to yourself until your subconscious accepts it?

Einion

 

[Einion]

On gaming and speed...

A little something for us old fogeys to bear in mind, you may have no choice but to come to terms with the fact that maybe you can't compete any longer (and never will again) when it comes to aspects of play that require split-second timing and reflexes/muscle memory. For 99% of people older joints, muscles and nerves simply can't compete with younger joints, muscles and nerves.

Although it definitely improves with practice (and drive?), human reaction time usually slows with age, and the slide may start in your 20s, not in the 30s or 40s. In gaming individual people may buck this trend, or they may just appear to with better tactical decisions and anticipation - based on lots of experience - versus outright faster reflexes.

If you're interested in seeing how you compete with the rest of the world in terms of reaction time, I started this thread.

Einion