Random Thought of the Day
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Drake Farstrider
New member
Because I can!
Hieronymus
Member
One of my favorite sayings is from Groucho Marx:
Outside of a dog, a book is man\'s best friend. Inside of a dog it\'s too dark to read.
Outside of a dog, a book is man\'s best friend. Inside of a dog it\'s too dark to read.
Another one to never trust:
A fat dietician
\"I\'m nobody\'s fool.... I belong to everyone.\" -- Sledge Hammer
\"If all the world\'s a stage, and the people, merely players.... who the heck is in the audience?\" -- unknown
\"They say the world is round ... but who are they?\" -- unknown
\"Do Unto Others -- Then Run\" -- Book title.
\"Fog is the world\'s most reliable source of solid, immoveable objects.\" -- Me.
A fat dietician
\"I\'m nobody\'s fool.... I belong to everyone.\" -- Sledge Hammer
\"If all the world\'s a stage, and the people, merely players.... who the heck is in the audience?\" -- unknown
\"They say the world is round ... but who are they?\" -- unknown
\"Do Unto Others -- Then Run\" -- Book title.
\"Fog is the world\'s most reliable source of solid, immoveable objects.\" -- Me.
\"You Odd-spaced sons-a-bitches!\" my Dad, while in traffic.
My Dad said this years ago, while trying to pull out onto a road. There weren\'t alot of cars, but they were spaced just close enough together to where you couldn\'t pull out. And just when you\'d think there was a space, a faster moving car would close the gap....
He was pretty pissed when he said it, but it has become a \'must say\' in my driving ever since. Try it, you\'ll like it!!
My Dad said this years ago, while trying to pull out onto a road. There weren\'t alot of cars, but they were spaced just close enough together to where you couldn\'t pull out. And just when you\'d think there was a space, a faster moving car would close the gap....
He was pretty pissed when he said it, but it has become a \'must say\' in my driving ever since. Try it, you\'ll like it!!
leopardpixie
New member
My mother your mother live across the street 1819 Blueberry St. Every time we have a fight this is what we say
\"Boys are rotten, made out of cotton, girls are handy made out of candy. Boys go to Jupiter to get more stuipder, girls gor to mars and get more candy bads.\"
Inka dinka Soda Pop, Inka Dinka Doo, Inka dinka Soda Pop, A boy loves you.
Wow random memory more like it
\"Boys are rotten, made out of cotton, girls are handy made out of candy. Boys go to Jupiter to get more stuipder, girls gor to mars and get more candy bads.\"
Inka dinka Soda Pop, Inka Dinka Doo, Inka dinka Soda Pop, A boy loves you.
Wow random memory more like it
Okaaaaaaaaay Dawn, just ease up on the sugar intake.
Legacy Account
Active member
Sod\'s Law dictates that toast will always land butter side down when dropped.
If you drop a cat it always lands on it\'s feet.
What would happen if you glued some toast to the cat\'s back??
If you drop a cat it always lands on it\'s feet.
What would happen if you glued some toast to the cat\'s back??
I have read an article where a physicist had calculated the probability of toast landing with the buttered side down and established that it was slightly more than 50 %. He had taken momentum of rotation and a slight alteration of the equilibrium point cause of the butter (and marmelade, I think) into account as well as other effects that I\'ve forgotten about.
I think there where still some \'holes\' in his arguments, but it was quite entertaining nonetheless.
I think there where still some \'holes\' in his arguments, but it was quite entertaining nonetheless.
Shawn R. L.
New member
This is a bit wordy but Ritual\'s post reminded me of it. It\'s worth it.
There are approximately two billion children (persons under 18) in the world. However, since Santa does not visit children of Muslim, Hindu, Jewish or Buddhist (except maybe in Japan) religions, this reduces the workload for Christmas night to 15% of the total, or 378 million (according to the population reference bureau). At an average (census) rate of 3.5 children per household, that comes to 108 million homes, presuming there is at least one good child in each.
Santa has about 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the different time zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming east to west (which seems logical). This works out to 967.7 visits per second. This is to say that for each Christian household with a good child, Santa has around 1/1000th of a second to park the sleigh, hop out, jump down the chimney, fill the stocking, distribute the remaining presents under the tree, eat whatever snacks have been left for him, get back up the chimney, jump into the sleigh and get onto the next house.
Assuming that each of these 108 million stops is evenly distributed around the earth (which, of course, we know to be false, but will accept for the purposes of our calculations), we are now talking about 0.78 miles per household; a total trip of 75.5 million miles, not counting bathroom stops or breaks.
This means Santa’s sleigh is moving at 650 miles per second--3,000 times the speed of sound. For purposes of comparison, the fastest man made vehicle, the Ulysses space probe, moves at a poky 27.4 miles per second, and a conventional reindeer can run (at best) 15 miles per hour.
The payload of the sleigh adds another interesting element. Assuming that each child gets nothing more than a medium sized LEGO set (two pounds), the sleigh is carrying over 500 thousands tons, not counting Santa himself. On land, a conventional reindeer can pull no more than 300 pounds. Even granting that the \"flying\" reindeer can pull 10 times the normal amount, the job can’t be done with eight or even nine of them---Santa would need 360,000 of them. This increases the payload, not counting the weight of the sleigh, another 54,000 tons, or roughly seven times the weight of the Queen Elizabeth (the ship, not the monarch).
600,000 tons traveling at 650 miles per second creates enormous air resistance—this would heat up the reindeer in the same fashion as a spacecraft re-entering the earth’s atmosphere. The lead pair of reindeer would adsorb 14.3 quintillion joules of energy per second each. In short, they would burst into flames almost instantaneously, exposing the reindeer behind them and creating deafening sonic booms in their wake. The entire reindeer team would be vaporized within 4.26 thousandths of a second, or right about the time Santa reached the fifth house on his trip.
Not that it matters, however, since Santa, as a result of accelerating from a dead stop to 650 m.p.s. in .001 seconds, would be subjected to acceleration forces of 17,000 g’s. A 250 pound Santa (which seems ludicrously slim) would be pinned to the back of the sleigh by 4,315,015 pounds of force, instantly crushing his bones and organs and reducing him to a quivering blob of pink goo. Therefore, if Santa did exist, he’s dead now.
Merry Christmas!
There are approximately two billion children (persons under 18) in the world. However, since Santa does not visit children of Muslim, Hindu, Jewish or Buddhist (except maybe in Japan) religions, this reduces the workload for Christmas night to 15% of the total, or 378 million (according to the population reference bureau). At an average (census) rate of 3.5 children per household, that comes to 108 million homes, presuming there is at least one good child in each.
Santa has about 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the different time zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming east to west (which seems logical). This works out to 967.7 visits per second. This is to say that for each Christian household with a good child, Santa has around 1/1000th of a second to park the sleigh, hop out, jump down the chimney, fill the stocking, distribute the remaining presents under the tree, eat whatever snacks have been left for him, get back up the chimney, jump into the sleigh and get onto the next house.
Assuming that each of these 108 million stops is evenly distributed around the earth (which, of course, we know to be false, but will accept for the purposes of our calculations), we are now talking about 0.78 miles per household; a total trip of 75.5 million miles, not counting bathroom stops or breaks.
This means Santa’s sleigh is moving at 650 miles per second--3,000 times the speed of sound. For purposes of comparison, the fastest man made vehicle, the Ulysses space probe, moves at a poky 27.4 miles per second, and a conventional reindeer can run (at best) 15 miles per hour.
The payload of the sleigh adds another interesting element. Assuming that each child gets nothing more than a medium sized LEGO set (two pounds), the sleigh is carrying over 500 thousands tons, not counting Santa himself. On land, a conventional reindeer can pull no more than 300 pounds. Even granting that the \"flying\" reindeer can pull 10 times the normal amount, the job can’t be done with eight or even nine of them---Santa would need 360,000 of them. This increases the payload, not counting the weight of the sleigh, another 54,000 tons, or roughly seven times the weight of the Queen Elizabeth (the ship, not the monarch).
600,000 tons traveling at 650 miles per second creates enormous air resistance—this would heat up the reindeer in the same fashion as a spacecraft re-entering the earth’s atmosphere. The lead pair of reindeer would adsorb 14.3 quintillion joules of energy per second each. In short, they would burst into flames almost instantaneously, exposing the reindeer behind them and creating deafening sonic booms in their wake. The entire reindeer team would be vaporized within 4.26 thousandths of a second, or right about the time Santa reached the fifth house on his trip.
Not that it matters, however, since Santa, as a result of accelerating from a dead stop to 650 m.p.s. in .001 seconds, would be subjected to acceleration forces of 17,000 g’s. A 250 pound Santa (which seems ludicrously slim) would be pinned to the back of the sleigh by 4,315,015 pounds of force, instantly crushing his bones and organs and reducing him to a quivering blob of pink goo. Therefore, if Santa did exist, he’s dead now.
Merry Christmas!
Herb the bitter
New member
I\'m surprised no one has yet brought up this Steven Wright quote as it seems fitting for this site:
\"It\'s a small world, but I wouldn\'t want to have to paint it.\"
\"It\'s a small world, but I wouldn\'t want to have to paint it.\"
