When I called to cancel my Citibank Mastercard, I got a briefer version of the same runaround. I was asked:
(paraphrased)
\"For what reason are you canceling?\"
\"I got another card.\"
\"What card?\"
\"Another one.\"
\"Why?\"
\"It has some benefits this one doesn\'t.\" (this is where I should have said \"Cancel. The. Account.\")
He asks what benefits, and then proceeds to try and UPSELL me on a better Citi card, at length. I finally say \"Look, just cancel the damn card, okay?\" and he goes all \"How have I offended you?\"!
I swear there\'s some shit-sack academy where they train these asshats to be tenacious phone weasels. I think these are the people who were too ugly to become used car salesmen but still wanted to badger customers for a living.
But I did get the card canceled. And I\'m never doing business with Citi again, even though I never had problems with their card. Why? First, I learned that Citi makes a lot of money running certain scummy outfits that lend to low-income homeowners at usurious rates. You know the type, essentially long-term payday loans where the monthly payments are low but the poor borrower ends up paying 4x the principal in interest. I want nothing to do with such people. And second... when I say \"cancel my card\"... cancel my f%%king card.