Infidel Castro
New member
You can laugh! This is heducayshunul. You must learn from our mistakes!
The \"awkward\" thread
- Thread starter Mosch
- Start date
james sequeira
New member
teach me with your stupidity lol
Infidel Castro
New member
I\'ve got bags of the stuff:
I was only young, about 8-9 probably, sat down with my Mam and the neighbour in our living room. They were talkinga bout something or other, a really innocuous thing no doubt. Words like stiff and rigid cropped up on several occasions, and in my juvenile brain something triggered me to say my willy goes like that when I get a hard-on!
I was sent to my room forthwith.
My Mam has more recently told me that as soon as I left the room the pair of them wet themselves with laughter. Aye, thanks Mam...
I was only young, about 8-9 probably, sat down with my Mam and the neighbour in our living room. They were talkinga bout something or other, a really innocuous thing no doubt. Words like stiff and rigid cropped up on several occasions, and in my juvenile brain something triggered me to say my willy goes like that when I get a hard-on!
I was sent to my room forthwith.
My Mam has more recently told me that as soon as I left the room the pair of them wet themselves with laughter. Aye, thanks Mam...
james sequeira
New member
lol legand
james sequeira
New member
on my first day at my saturday job at a toy shop i was helping this man sort out stock he was telling me how he was taking one of women out then back to his
i came out with you gonna bed her then
from then on i was known as the funny small lad lol
i came out with you gonna bed her then
from then on i was known as the funny small lad lol
Infidel Castro
New member
I did a boo-boo similar to that. When my previous relationship was in its embryonic stage (the part before a relationship sours) I met my future father-in-law-to-be, a Welshman who had lived in S Africa for many years (my ex-wife was born there). He was in the UK on business and came over to see my ex-wife. We had a pint in a pub nearby and then went home to my ex\'s pad. We all sat down and ate food in the lounge, probably takeaway I think, and talk turned to my future-father-in-law-to-be\'s ex-wife remarrying (for a third time). There was uhming-and-ahing about the matter and shrugged shoulders, etc., at which point - for no particular reason other than sheer stupidity - I piped up with hey, it\'s just another notch on the bedpost.
The conversation went flat as you like. I had misjudged my position. I felt stupid.
The conversation went flat as you like. I had misjudged my position. I felt stupid.
vincegamer
Active member
I hope you have since learned that the proper way to open a bottle is to hold it against the edge of a table or countertop with a bit of the cap sticking over the top, then pound straight down on it with your fist.
Once, during a night of drunken revelry, 4 of my friends and I had stripped down to our boxers (god knows why) and were running out of the house, into the snow, and rolling around before running back inside,and soaking in the bath (the kitchen sink)
Well, on the last run, we had a nice long snowfight, and got incredibly cold, before running back to the door. Ezra tried the door...tried it again....and tried it again. We had locked ourselves out.
Sobriety and herd panic struck quickly, as we realized we were standing in outside in our boxers at 4 a.m, 30 km from town. It was about -20, and Ez\'s mom had very nicely vacated the house for the night. I\'m pretty sure sure there were several panicked wails \"We\'re gonna die!!\"
We ended up resorting to the extreme of breaking through a window to trip the latch. The next morning, his mom came home to us in our boxers, covered in leaves and dirt, lying in pools of meltwater, with beer cans EVERYWHERE, and of course, a broken window.
The funny part of the story? The door wasn\'t locked.....
I\'m sure I\'ve got plenty more personal ones, but I\'ll have to think a bit more. They tend to involve alcohol
Well, on the last run, we had a nice long snowfight, and got incredibly cold, before running back to the door. Ezra tried the door...tried it again....and tried it again. We had locked ourselves out.
Sobriety and herd panic struck quickly, as we realized we were standing in outside in our boxers at 4 a.m, 30 km from town. It was about -20, and Ez\'s mom had very nicely vacated the house for the night. I\'m pretty sure sure there were several panicked wails \"We\'re gonna die!!\"
We ended up resorting to the extreme of breaking through a window to trip the latch. The next morning, his mom came home to us in our boxers, covered in leaves and dirt, lying in pools of meltwater, with beer cans EVERYWHERE, and of course, a broken window.
The funny part of the story? The door wasn\'t locked.....
I\'m sure I\'ve got plenty more personal ones, but I\'ll have to think a bit more. They tend to involve alcohol
Ooh, right, in grade ten, I puked myself senseless in the yard of the girl I liked.....but not before being tossed around the yard-- as she looked on in horror, or was it disgust?-- by her older brother, as I had puked in his mom\'s garden.
Thank god she didn\'t know I liked her, because as it was, it took a really long time to live that one down.
EDIT: Just recently, on an overnight trip with my Environmental Studies class, I was brushing my teeth in the morning, in front of the mirror. For whatever reason, I was bobbing up and down. I had put my head down and was in the act of spitting,when I bobbed just a bit too enthusiastically, and smashed my head into the mirror. I recoiled, with my head down, and spat all the toothpaste straight onto the crotch of my jeans. It cleaned up reasonably okay, but my pride was definitely wounded.
Thank god she didn\'t know I liked her, because as it was, it took a really long time to live that one down.
EDIT: Just recently, on an overnight trip with my Environmental Studies class, I was brushing my teeth in the morning, in front of the mirror. For whatever reason, I was bobbing up and down. I had put my head down and was in the act of spitting,when I bobbed just a bit too enthusiastically, and smashed my head into the mirror. I recoiled, with my head down, and spat all the toothpaste straight onto the crotch of my jeans. It cleaned up reasonably okay, but my pride was definitely wounded.
lollollol
This thread is a lot of fun, so I\'ll bring it back up, in case someone else remembers something.
Once, strolling around my hometown, on the corner of the street, I hit my forehead on a foldable sign post I didn\'t notice was unfolded... BANG !
I have a good walking pace so the hit was so hard I fell on my back.
I had a huge crescent shaped scratch right in the middle, just small enough not to need stiches, but really sticking out and I had to explain how I got this, by walking on the street... it took 6 months for it to heal completely.
This thread is a lot of fun, so I\'ll bring it back up, in case someone else remembers something.
Once, strolling around my hometown, on the corner of the street, I hit my forehead on a foldable sign post I didn\'t notice was unfolded... BANG !
I have a good walking pace so the hit was so hard I fell on my back.
I had a huge crescent shaped scratch right in the middle, just small enough not to need stiches, but really sticking out and I had to explain how I got this, by walking on the street... it took 6 months for it to heal completely.
That reminds me of my cousin who grew up across the street from me. I remember when he was in 7th grade, some girl called him a faggot. He came home and looked it up in the dictionary and was totally confused. He couldn\'t for the life of him understand why she\'d called him \"a bundle of sticks\" lol
funnymouth
Active member
ok, here is another one. turn back the clock to my freshman year in college fall, quarter. my school has many strange traditions, one of which is particularly legendary \"first rain.\" during the first rain storm of the school year people get naked, an masse, and run around campus in a big , wet, hooting and hollering herd. it sounds strange, but is far more bizzare (and strangely enthralling) in person. on a cold night in october the drizzle hit the ground and hormone frenzied college students hit the paths of ucsc. the rumble of splashing feet and wild nakedness could be heared in the distance like approaching thunder. at the time i \"happened\" to be studying on my bed in front of my window on the second floor of my dormatory . they came by the thousands; storming the quad with slippery skin and unbridled enthusiasm only seen in sexually repressed, rebelling, teens and internet forum junkies. i watched from the corner of my eye and continued reading.
a voice in the crowd, faint but decernable: \"enos\" (my real name),......\"enos,\".........\"ENOS!\" i looked across the sea of boobies and bobbing heads for the source of this mystery caller, only to find it below my window. it was sam, a guy who had graduated from my high school a few years before me, a popular kid that our class looked up to. he was looking up at me now, stark naked in the rain. \"hey enos come run with us man! get naked and get down here!\"
i declined. there was an odd, long silence. \"ok,\" he said, \"see you around,\" and he was reabsorbed in to the mass of churnig flesh. i saw him around. it was awkward.
. they came by the thousands; storming the quad with slippery skin and unbridled enthusiasm only seen in sexually repressed, rebelling, teens and internet forum junkies. i watched from the corner of my eye and continued reading.a voice in the crowd, faint but decernable: \"enos\" (my real name),......\"enos,\".........\"ENOS!\" i looked across the sea of boobies and bobbing heads for the source of this mystery caller, only to find it below my window. it was sam, a guy who had graduated from my high school a few years before me, a popular kid that our class looked up to. he was looking up at me now, stark naked in the rain. \"hey enos come run with us man! get naked and get down here!\"
i declined. there was an odd, long silence. \"ok,\" he said, \"see you around,\" and he was reabsorbed in to the mass of churnig flesh. i saw him around. it was awkward.
RunnyBunny
Total jerk from NewJersey
Reading all of these posts made me think of so much stupid stuff ive been involved with. its great.
When I was a new driver, i was allowed to use my step dads car on occasion. This time was midday and me and two buddies went to some store to buy gonish cones ( incense ) and headed for another store. while we were inside one of my friends waited in the car and lit one of the cones and put it on the gear shifter, got bored and came in the store after us. when i got outside the rubber on the shifter had melted with a nice hole.
I was pissed but it ws ok. Cause we had just bought some super soakers and were in the process of squirting innocent people. soon enough though we were stopped at a traffic stop by one of those police officers that atnd in the middle of the road waving traffic.
My friend ( the jackass that burned my step fathers car) starts bragging that he is gonna shoot the cop with the water pistol. I pleaded with him to stop and thought the issue finished when all of a sudden the cops head jerks down.
( i should mention that he was talking to another cop ). this turned into a bad scene starting with the cop pounding the hood of my fathers car and ripping me out by my shirt.
The whole thing was resolved rather quick with no one going to jail. We did have to plead with the cops that the incense wasnt for covering up pot smoke and that we were good kiddies. My friend got community service for a month.
The worst part was i had to explain to my parents why the car was damged upon return, and that \" no mom we werent smoking pot in the car\"
The local paper wrote about the incident in the paper the next day. I found out that a 1/2 hour earlier another cop at the smae spot had his hand closed in a car window and dragged half a mile. so i guess thats why the police were so pissed in the first place.:flame:
When I was a new driver, i was allowed to use my step dads car on occasion. This time was midday and me and two buddies went to some store to buy gonish cones ( incense ) and headed for another store. while we were inside one of my friends waited in the car and lit one of the cones and put it on the gear shifter, got bored and came in the store after us. when i got outside the rubber on the shifter had melted with a nice hole.
I was pissed but it ws ok. Cause we had just bought some super soakers and were in the process of squirting innocent people. soon enough though we were stopped at a traffic stop by one of those police officers that atnd in the middle of the road waving traffic.
My friend ( the jackass that burned my step fathers car) starts bragging that he is gonna shoot the cop with the water pistol. I pleaded with him to stop and thought the issue finished when all of a sudden the cops head jerks down.
( i should mention that he was talking to another cop ). this turned into a bad scene starting with the cop pounding the hood of my fathers car and ripping me out by my shirt.
The whole thing was resolved rather quick with no one going to jail. We did have to plead with the cops that the incense wasnt for covering up pot smoke and that we were good kiddies. My friend got community service for a month.
The worst part was i had to explain to my parents why the car was damged upon return, and that \" no mom we werent smoking pot in the car\"
The local paper wrote about the incident in the paper the next day. I found out that a 1/2 hour earlier another cop at the smae spot had his hand closed in a car window and dragged half a mile. so i guess thats why the police were so pissed in the first place.:flame:
Tony Manero
New member
same to me. when i was 10 a friend of mine called me \"mongoloid\". I looked in dictionary and i find for first definition \"peoples of North Asia and Central Asia\" because in Italian it\'s the same word.
I was a bit confused. ???
johnboyjjb
Active member
Some indecency involved:
My wife and I, before we were married, were in the living room getting it on while clothed (I have always liked skirts). Her Grandfather and Grandmother are in the family room on the other side of the house. Right as I am passing the point of no return, her Grandparents start getting ready to leave. I am sitting on the couch finishing with her on top of me having a 3 minute conversation with her grandparents as they walk out the door. Grandmother was oblivious but I think grandpa knew.
My wife and I, before we were married, were in the living room getting it on while clothed (I have always liked skirts). Her Grandfather and Grandmother are in the family room on the other side of the house. Right as I am passing the point of no return, her Grandparents start getting ready to leave. I am sitting on the couch finishing with her on top of me having a 3 minute conversation with her grandparents as they walk out the door. Grandmother was oblivious but I think grandpa knew.
funnymouth
Active member
niiiiiiiiiiiiiiice
maybe your \"oh\" face gave it away! :wow:
maybe your \"oh\" face gave it away! :wow:
