well, while browsing the wikis disgraced cousin last night, i typed in warhammer 40 k and look what came up:
http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Warhammer_40k
“Comrades, you have no need of expensive models. I can get you a crate of vodka much cheaper than that.”
~ Stalin on Warhammer 40K
“Dudes, you don\'t need all those models, I can get you a shopping bag full of LSD way cheaper than that.”
~ A hippy from the 60s
“Games Workshop are a bunch of thieving bastards”
~ Ghandi
“These Space Marines are my kind of people”
~ Adolf Hitler
“ Well, plastic is expensive...”
~ Gavin Thorpe
“ I sold the Imperium and only got three Guardsmen you bastard! ”
~ Horus on Gavin Thorpe
“ Why make peace when you can blow up everything you lay eyes on? ”
~ Jesus in the year 40000
“ Would someone please ask the Emperor to hurry up and get off the crapper? ”
~ Chuck Norris
“ I used to be an atheist until I realized... I\'m a God”
~ The Emperor of Mankind on Himself
“The grim darkness of the far future is pretty awesome, except for the fact that when you\'re done shelling out your life savings and spending weeks assembling and painting your army, you find out that there\'s nobody else who was as dumb as you were to start collecting themselves...what the hell am I supposed to do with all these Orks now?”
~ Deadpool on why it especially sucks to be an Ork player
“If you play Warhammer again, I\'ll start huffing kittens again!”
~ Oscar Wilde on what happens when you or your mom plays Warhammer
and a little below it
Things Not To Say To A Games Workshop Employee
The mention of the following to a Games Workshop employee will cause them to strike you down with their strength 6 power weapons, gifted to them by Lord Jervis.
So, how much is this?
Are you gay?
Oh, so this is why your wife left you.
What \"team\" do you collect?
I\'ve just started playing. Is Marneus Calgar a good starter unit?
How can you survive outside GW, do you need a gas mask or something?
Do you have a girlfriend?
6 trees for £20! That\'s a rip off!
Isn\'t hobbycraft terrain cheaper?
Ever jacked off anywhere other than your chair?
How much is this Lemon Russ?
Don\'t you feel guilty, dirty and full of shame when you go home?
Doesn\'t working for GW want to make you kill your co-workers?
Aren\'t Space Marines a bit overpowered?
The way you\'ve painted that thing with horns makes it look really cute!
Do you have a life?
Why is it that these guys have had guns for thousands of years, and yet have reverted back to fighting with axes and swords?
Do your customers realize they are being robbed? Seriously, GW crap is expensive. You\'ll never be able to afford a home if you keep playing. Do you have a home?
Ooooooh, like video games. Without the fun!
There was a Chuck Norris model released in 2004 but it was recalled when over four hundred people died from ownage over-dosing.
What can I get for a buck?
Does that model come in men\'s?
Do those dice come in men\'s?
Does that rulebook come in men\'s?
Does that 6\" ruler come in men\'s?
That 6\" ruler is your penis.
Does it still come in men\'s?
You make the best domino pieces ever.
I thought Satan was the only one who dealt in the bartering of souls for material possessions.
Wow, this stuff is really expensive.
Why the hell would I pay $8 for super glue?
Can I just use your bathroom?
I\'ll buy it when some rich person dies and leaves me their fortune.
Oh my god! What the fuck is that smell!? Sniff, sniff; Is that... Is that you!?!
You know there are other things outside of this store right?
Space Marines suck!
You guys are geeks!
N00b!
Orc is spelled Orc not Ork.
I thought Rhinos were animals.
Aww sucks. Can I roll again?
Is this move legal?
But the book says...
Do the models come assembled?
Do they come painted?
Can you paint my models for me?
Do you have the latest Squats codex?
Can that black spiky guy hit that blue guy with that big tank thing?
WHY THE HELL NOT???!!!
Oh shit! no-one panic. Don\'t tell ANYONE or this\'ll happen to you too. *runs out of GW*
Do you live for the beeping noise?
What do i do now?
What about now?
Do you like my girl friend?
Is it my move?
lol
i understand that by some the above
post may be seen as offensive and if so i am truly sory
http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Warhammer_40k
“Comrades, you have no need of expensive models. I can get you a crate of vodka much cheaper than that.”
~ Stalin on Warhammer 40K
“Dudes, you don\'t need all those models, I can get you a shopping bag full of LSD way cheaper than that.”
~ A hippy from the 60s
“Games Workshop are a bunch of thieving bastards”
~ Ghandi
“These Space Marines are my kind of people”
~ Adolf Hitler
“ Well, plastic is expensive...”
~ Gavin Thorpe
“ I sold the Imperium and only got three Guardsmen you bastard! ”
~ Horus on Gavin Thorpe
“ Why make peace when you can blow up everything you lay eyes on? ”
~ Jesus in the year 40000
“ Would someone please ask the Emperor to hurry up and get off the crapper? ”
~ Chuck Norris
“ I used to be an atheist until I realized... I\'m a God”
~ The Emperor of Mankind on Himself
“The grim darkness of the far future is pretty awesome, except for the fact that when you\'re done shelling out your life savings and spending weeks assembling and painting your army, you find out that there\'s nobody else who was as dumb as you were to start collecting themselves...what the hell am I supposed to do with all these Orks now?”
~ Deadpool on why it especially sucks to be an Ork player
“If you play Warhammer again, I\'ll start huffing kittens again!”
~ Oscar Wilde on what happens when you or your mom plays Warhammer
and a little below it
Things Not To Say To A Games Workshop Employee
The mention of the following to a Games Workshop employee will cause them to strike you down with their strength 6 power weapons, gifted to them by Lord Jervis.
So, how much is this?
Are you gay?
Oh, so this is why your wife left you.
What \"team\" do you collect?
I\'ve just started playing. Is Marneus Calgar a good starter unit?
How can you survive outside GW, do you need a gas mask or something?
Do you have a girlfriend?
6 trees for £20! That\'s a rip off!
Isn\'t hobbycraft terrain cheaper?
Ever jacked off anywhere other than your chair?
How much is this Lemon Russ?
Don\'t you feel guilty, dirty and full of shame when you go home?
Doesn\'t working for GW want to make you kill your co-workers?
Aren\'t Space Marines a bit overpowered?
The way you\'ve painted that thing with horns makes it look really cute!
Do you have a life?
Why is it that these guys have had guns for thousands of years, and yet have reverted back to fighting with axes and swords?
Do your customers realize they are being robbed? Seriously, GW crap is expensive. You\'ll never be able to afford a home if you keep playing. Do you have a home?
Ooooooh, like video games. Without the fun!
There was a Chuck Norris model released in 2004 but it was recalled when over four hundred people died from ownage over-dosing.
What can I get for a buck?
Does that model come in men\'s?
Do those dice come in men\'s?
Does that rulebook come in men\'s?
Does that 6\" ruler come in men\'s?
That 6\" ruler is your penis.
Does it still come in men\'s?
You make the best domino pieces ever.
I thought Satan was the only one who dealt in the bartering of souls for material possessions.
Wow, this stuff is really expensive.
Why the hell would I pay $8 for super glue?
Can I just use your bathroom?
I\'ll buy it when some rich person dies and leaves me their fortune.
Oh my god! What the fuck is that smell!? Sniff, sniff; Is that... Is that you!?!
You know there are other things outside of this store right?
Space Marines suck!
You guys are geeks!
N00b!
Orc is spelled Orc not Ork.
I thought Rhinos were animals.
Aww sucks. Can I roll again?
Is this move legal?
But the book says...
Do the models come assembled?
Do they come painted?
Can you paint my models for me?
Do you have the latest Squats codex?
Can that black spiky guy hit that blue guy with that big tank thing?
WHY THE HELL NOT???!!!
Oh shit! no-one panic. Don\'t tell ANYONE or this\'ll happen to you too. *runs out of GW*
Do you live for the beeping noise?
What do i do now?
What about now?
Do you like my girl friend?
Is it my move?
lol
i understand that by some the above
post may be seen as offensive and if so i am truly sory
