ipaintminis
Active member
*runs to Texas, grabs beer*
*panting* here you are Mr.Cult, enjoy!
*panting* here you are Mr.Cult, enjoy!
Tales from the Freak Bar
- Thread starter Bubba
- Start date
Leffe Blonde, Brune, Cuvee, Radieuse or Triple?
A drunk is driving through the city and his car is weaving all over the road. Eventually a cop pulls him over.
\"Did you know,\" says the cop, \"that a few intersections back, your wife fell out of your car?\"
\"Oh, thank heavens,\" sighs the drunk. \"For a minute there, I thought I\'d gone deaf.\"
A drunk is driving through the city and his car is weaving all over the road. Eventually a cop pulls him over.
\"Did you know,\" says the cop, \"that a few intersections back, your wife fell out of your car?\"
\"Oh, thank heavens,\" sighs the drunk. \"For a minute there, I thought I\'d gone deaf.\"
Dragon Forge Design
New member
Oh well then make it a leinenkugel\'s red please
wiccanpony
Official Freak Bar Witch
My oh, my....while we are having no rain, it’s hot enough to make the devil put in AC..... may have to strip down, can anyone reach the back zipper, plz. :innocent:Bubba...love, just a suggestion, when you tire of changing the threads title, perhaps calling it Tales from the Freak Bar or something in that flavor...so everyone knows where to come and play. I know I\'m having fun :flip:
Dragon Forge Design
New member
Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzp!
is that better?
is that better?
wiccanpony
Official Freak Bar Witch
yes.....much betterDrake Farstrider
New member
I will have one of each please!
freakinacage
Well-known member
i\'d like a pint of brains extra cold (a local beer) and a packet of spicy nuts. if the nuts are out of date like last time, i\'ll just have some pork scratchings please. oh, and have one for yourself
Thank you Mr. Cage. Spicy pork rinds are over here and a new batch of salty nuts are up. Should have a new barrel in next week - we can hull our own and toss the hulls in the floor (supposed to be good for the wood floor).
Very wonderful idea Ms. Pony.
And I for one am certainly glad you are having a good time here.
Very wonderful idea Ms. Pony.
And I for one am certainly glad you are having a good time here.
Thirsty Thursdays
ALL drinks are 2-4-1 today. Name a drink not in my bartender\'s guide and it is 3-4-1.
A man was walking down the street when he was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless man who asked him for a couple of dollars for dinner.
The man took out his wallet, extracted ten dollars and asked, “If I give you this money, will you buy some beer with it instead of dinner?”
“No, I had to stop drinking beer years ago,” the homeless man replied.
“Will you use it to go fishing instead of buying food?” the man asked.
“No, I don’t waste time fishing,” the homeless man said. “I need to spend all my time trying to stay alive.”
“Will you spend this on minis or paints at a game shop instead of food?” the man asked.
“Are you NUTS!” replied the homeless man. “I haven’t painted minis in 20 years!”
“Will you spend the money on a woman in the red light district instead of food?” the man asked.
“What disease would I get for ten lousy bucks?” exclaimed the homeless man.
“Well,” said the man, “I’m not going to give you the money. Instead, I’m going to take you home for a terrific dinner cooked by my wife.”
The homeless man was astounded. “Won’t your wife be furious with you for doing that? I know I’m dirty, and I probably smell pretty disgusting.”
The man replied, “That’s okay. It’s important for her to see what a man looks like after he has given up beer, fishing, minis, and sex.”
lol
ALL drinks are 2-4-1 today. Name a drink not in my bartender\'s guide and it is 3-4-1.
A man was walking down the street when he was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless man who asked him for a couple of dollars for dinner.
The man took out his wallet, extracted ten dollars and asked, “If I give you this money, will you buy some beer with it instead of dinner?”
“No, I had to stop drinking beer years ago,” the homeless man replied.
“Will you use it to go fishing instead of buying food?” the man asked.
“No, I don’t waste time fishing,” the homeless man said. “I need to spend all my time trying to stay alive.”
“Will you spend this on minis or paints at a game shop instead of food?” the man asked.
“Are you NUTS!” replied the homeless man. “I haven’t painted minis in 20 years!”
“Will you spend the money on a woman in the red light district instead of food?” the man asked.
“What disease would I get for ten lousy bucks?” exclaimed the homeless man.
“Well,” said the man, “I’m not going to give you the money. Instead, I’m going to take you home for a terrific dinner cooked by my wife.”
The homeless man was astounded. “Won’t your wife be furious with you for doing that? I know I’m dirty, and I probably smell pretty disgusting.”
The man replied, “That’s okay. It’s important for her to see what a man looks like after he has given up beer, fishing, minis, and sex.”
lol
wiccanpony
Official Freak Bar Witch
Opening door with my special freak key...heads over to favorite barstool, hikes up short skirt and sits.....Morning Bubba, I’m in the mood for Pink Lemonade today and cream cheese & lox...moan...another hot day and the paint is drying on my brush before I can get on the mini, grrrrrr. Looks around to see who’s here.let me tell you this joke...
A young blonde from Texas was on holiday and driving through the Everglades.
She wanted to take home a pair of genuine alligator shoes in the worst way, but was very reluctant to pay the high prices the local vendors were asking.
After becoming very frustrated with the \"no haggle on prices\"
attitude of one of the shopkeepers, the blonde shouted, \"Well then, maybe I\'ll just go out and catch my own alligator, so I can get a pair of shoes for free!\"
The shopkeeper said with a sly, knowing smile, \"Little lady, just go and give it a try!\" The blonde headed out toward the swamps, determined to catch an alligator.
Later in the day, as the shopkeeper is driving home, he pulls over to the side of the road where he spots that same young woman standing waist deep in the murky bayou water, shotgun in hand.
Just then, he spots a huge 9-foot gator swimming rapidly toward her. With lightning speed, she takes aim, kills the creature and hauls it onto the slimy bank of the swamp.
Lying nearby were 7 more of the dead creatures, all lying on their backs.
The shopkeeper stood on the bank, watching in silent amazement.
The blonde struggled and flipped the gator onto its back.
Rolling her eyes heaven-ward and screaming in great frustration, she shouts out......
\"............THIS ONE\'S BAREFOOT, TOO
lollol
