freakinacage
Well-known member
a brunette, a smart blonde and santa all fall off a bridge - who hits the water first?
the brunette the others don\'t exist!
the brunette the others don\'t exist!
There\'s a joke inside this thread with a naughty word in it...
- Thread starter Infidel Castro
- Start date
Shawn R. L.
New member
Guy goes to the local bar to teach the drunks the dangers of alcohol. He puts two shot glasses on the bar and fills one with wiskey and the other with water. Next he puts a live worm in each. The one in the water wiggles about unharmed. The one in the wiskey thrashes about and quickly dies. He looks at his audience and says:\"folks, do ya see my point? Can someone tell me the lesson to be learned here?\"
Well, the drunk in the back pipes up and says:\"Sure, I get it! If ya drink whiskey ya dont get worms!\"
Here in the States we have an activist group called MADD which stands for - Mothers Against Drunk Driving. Well, there is now a counter group called DAMM. Drunks Against Mad Mothers!
Well, the drunk in the back pipes up and says:\"Sure, I get it! If ya drink whiskey ya dont get worms!\"
Here in the States we have an activist group called MADD which stands for - Mothers Against Drunk Driving. Well, there is now a counter group called DAMM. Drunks Against Mad Mothers!
This reminds me…
How do you get a Nun pregnant?
You FUCK HER!!
Blonde joke:
There are two blondes walking in the woods.
The first blonde looks down and says “Oh look bear tracks.”
The second one says “No, those are deer tracks.”
“No they’re not they’re bear tracks”
“Deer tracks”
“BEAR TRACKS”
“DEER TRACKS”
And they kept arguing back and forth until the train hit them.
A pregnant woman passes by a bank when a couple of robbers try to get away, guns blazing. She\'s hit by a couple of bullets and brought to the hospital.
There the doctors inform her that her triplet each are hit by a bullet, but no vital organs were hit and since they\'e still unborn they won\'t risk surgery an the bullets have to come out the natural way. The woman gives birth to the triplet (two girls and a boy) and everything seems allright.
13 years later one of the girls comes to her mother in panic and explains that she was peeing, felt a bit of pain and when she looked, there was a bullet in the toilet. The mother explains the story to her daughter and the daughter leaves, reassured.
A few days later, the second daughter runs to her with exactly the same story. The mother does the explanation again and again the daughter leaves, reassured.
About a week later, the boy runs down the stairs, a bit wild-eyed. \"Mother\", he says, \"Something terrible happened!\".
\"I know\", she responds, \"you were peeing and all of a sudden there was a bullet in the toilet, wasn\'t there?\"
\"NO!\", he replies in tears, \"I was masturbating and i shot the dog!\"
There the doctors inform her that her triplet each are hit by a bullet, but no vital organs were hit and since they\'e still unborn they won\'t risk surgery an the bullets have to come out the natural way. The woman gives birth to the triplet (two girls and a boy) and everything seems allright.
13 years later one of the girls comes to her mother in panic and explains that she was peeing, felt a bit of pain and when she looked, there was a bullet in the toilet. The mother explains the story to her daughter and the daughter leaves, reassured.
A few days later, the second daughter runs to her with exactly the same story. The mother does the explanation again and again the daughter leaves, reassured.
About a week later, the boy runs down the stairs, a bit wild-eyed. \"Mother\", he says, \"Something terrible happened!\".
\"I know\", she responds, \"you were peeing and all of a sudden there was a bullet in the toilet, wasn\'t there?\"
\"NO!\", he replies in tears, \"I was masturbating and i shot the dog!\"
A man walks into a butchers. He says to the owner, \"What happened to your assistant?\" \"I sacked him\" \"why?\" \"Hes been sticking his d**k in the bacon slicer\" \"what happened to the bacon slicer?\" \"I sacked her aswell\"
Get it? It were a woman! Thats the twist you see!
Get it? It were a woman! Thats the twist you see!
Shawn R. L.
New member
I was behind schedule at the airport, running to catch my flight but, holy smokes, them planes are FAST.lol
Infidel Castro
New member
Were there racist jokes Vike? Have they been pulled? Genuinely surprised anyone would have a crack at racist jokes here 
I would agree with you there, I won\'t endorse Mordred\'s joke; but he was saying that the people telling the joke were KKK members, at least he wasn\'t saying that was his own personal opinion. I still think it isn\'t appropriate though, because anybody could argue on this for ages with those cartoons of the Prophet Mohammed (pbuh), I don\'t think we need that sort of friction.
Ebonbuddha
Active member
Why don’t accountants ever get constipated?
Because accountants can work out ANYTHING with a pencil!
Because accountants can work out ANYTHING with a pencil!
